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The house felt close--too confining, too temporary. The decay weighed me down. I walked to the front door, barely noticing when the doorknob melted in my hand. Stepping off the porch, I breathed in deeply and looked up at the sky. The stars, cold and bright, felt like good company. Odd shadows and hints of light surrounded me. I saw everything. Not only was every leaf, every blade of grass perfectly defined, there was more--just beyond what I was seeing.
“Evelyn, love, where are you going?” Reth caught up, standing next to me.
“The light and shadows. Where are they coming from?”
“Paths and possibilities. I can teach you how to manipulate them, if you'd like. ”
I stared up at the stars. Lifting my burning hand, I held it flat against the air. “There's something here,” I said softly, my voice foreign and strange in my ears. There was so much more to this world, more than I had ever felt. “A door. ”
Reth put his hand on my arm. “Oh, you don't need to bother with that. That's nothing. I'll make the door. You belong with me, by my side for eternity. ”
I turned back to the sky. If I aligned those stars just right in my vision, it looked like a gate. Odd I'd never noticed.
“Evelyn, stop,” Reth said, an edge of panic in his voice now.
“Stop what?”
“You don't want to let them go. Not like this. ”
I turned to him, frowning. “What are you talking about?”
“The souls. You need them. That is not the gate you're supposed to open. ”
“My souls. ” I sighed. I loved them. Closing my eyes, I breathed in deeply, tracing the energy, my energy, my souls. I was filled. But underneath, vague and gnawing, I felt off. It was too much, and not enough, all at the same time. The flames were stretching me, changing me. And while I was already full to bursting, I could feel the craving, the desire seeping in. “I want more,” I whispered.
“Well, that can be arranged. Come on. ” Reth pulled gently on my arm. Why didn't I burn him?
Then I noticed lights. It took me several seconds to realize it was a car. It screeched to a stop in front of us and a man jumped out of the driver's side. His soul was a pale, quavering thing, already on the decline. It made me feel peaceful in a way I couldn't explain, tender toward its fragile beauty.
Then the other door opened. I went rigid. If I had thought Reth's was beautiful, it was nothing to this soul. It filled the night with light, dancing and rippling like the reflection on a pond. I hadn't seen many souls, but I knew that this one was special. I wanted it. I needed it.
“Evie!”
I blinked, trying to filter through my disconnect and place the voice.
“Evie, are you okay?”
“Lend. ” My Lend. It clicked into place. That soul was my Lend. I clenched my hands into fists at my side. I shouldn't take that one.
“What's--Your voice, it's different. What did he do to you?”
I squinted, trying to see Lend's face over his soul. Maybe if I could see his face I wouldn't want him so badly, maybe I'd be able to stop. I lifted one hand toward him.
“Oh, go ahead,” Reth said. “He doesn't matter. But do hurry, we should be getting along. ”
“What happened?” Lend ran up to me, within reach. I wanted to cry as I put my hand on his chest, but I couldn't. It had to be mine. I opened up the channel--
And gasped. In that moment, touching Lend's soul, I finally connected with my own. It had been lost in the swirl of new souls, overwhelmed. But my soul knew Lend's, loved it, and it was enough.
I pulled my hand back before Lend lost anything. Closing my eyes, I held onto that recognition, focused on my own soul in the flames. And then I noticed the individuals. Hundreds of them, freed from Vivian only to be trapped again. My breath caught--I felt Lish's. I knew it was hers. Gentle and intelligent, swirling nearest to my heart. I wanted to keep her with me forever.
The guilt came then and I tried to push it down. If I let them go, I didn't belong with Lend. Not with the soul I'd seen. I'd burn out and he'd continue, eternal and breathtaking. Just like Vivian had said.
“If I keep them, I could stay with you. ” Tears streamed down my face.
“Keep what?”
“The souls. ”
