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"Sam," Declan called as he climbed to his feet.
But I didn't stop. I couldn't. I needed to find a way to pull myself back together and I couldn't do that in front of these men. Hell, I didn't even know if I could do it, period.
"Sorry, my son is waiting…" I lied. I was halfway down the hall with the front door in view, so my escape was imminent.
That was when Declan said, "Sam, Matias is okay."
I came to a stumbling halt as my brain processed his words. I whirled around and looked at him.
"He is?" I asked as all the humiliation I'd been feeling was gone just like that and relief flooded every cell in my body. "He's alive?"
Before Declan could respond, I heard the front door behind me open. I didn't know how I knew, but I did. I knew exactly who would be standing there when I turned around.
Still, when I did turn, the sight of Matias nearly drove me to my knees. He looked perfectly fine. Unhurt and strong and beautiful. The lifeless eyes that had been haunting me for weeks were full of light. I almost started to walk toward him but then I saw a man appear behind him, his expression grim. Beyond him were several more men. I looked back at Matias and saw something in his eyes that I'd never seen before.
Regret.
If it had just been me and him and he’d been returning to my house after his abrupt departure, I could've written off the regret as being related to that, but in my gut I knew it had nothing to do with the events of how we’d parted. I confirmed that by looking at Declan. The worry in his eyes was clear.
The worry for me.
Oh God.
Chapter 19
Matias
My relief at seeing Sam unhurt was short-lived because the first words that came out of his mouth were filled with pure terror.
"Ryan? Elliot?" he breathed, his voice catching on his children's names.
I knew instantly what he was asking. As I hurried to close the distance between us, I said, "They're fine. They're both fine, Sam. I promise you."
His relief was palpable. As soon as I reached him, he put out his arm and grabbed onto me. Then his hands were on my face. "You're okay?" he asked as his swollen, reddened eyes scanned my body.
I managed to nod, but nothing more. I couldn't comprehend his level of worry. Why would it be for me? Especially after the way I’d left.
Sam pushed into my arms while his went around my neck. "I'm sorry, Matias, I didn't know what else to do. I was so scared."
I had no clue what he was talking about. But I automatically put my arms around him and held him close. I remembered that we had an audience, but I didn't care. It wasn't until I looked up at Declan and saw him watching the both of us that something finally clicked in my muddled brain. I was so floored by the possibility that I found myself putting distance between my and Sam's bodies so I could look him in the eye. "Did you come here for me?" I asked in disbelief.
Sam dropped his eyes. He looked like he was going to be physically ill. On the drive over to Declan's house, I'd been trying to figure out how to tell Sam about the danger he and his sons were now in because of me. I'd planned to do it back at his house but looking at him now and realizing he was blaming himself for something he had absolutely nothing to feel guilty about, I knew I couldn't wait that long.
To Declan I said, "Is there some place he and I can talk?"
"The den," he said as he motioned to a door by the front entryway.
I wrapped my fingers around Sam’s and led him to the door in question. Once I had Sam inside, I slammed the door shut and then I was pressing him up against it. I kissed him before he could say anything else. I expected him to protest, but to my surprise, he let out a soft little cry and then he was kissing me as desperately as I was him. When I was forced to break the kiss before things went beyond the point of no return, both of us were panting hard. Sam’s hands were on my face but as reality returned, his face fell and he slowly dropped them. His eyes held mine for a moment, then he was moving away from me. He went to stand behind the couch. I couldn’t help but wonder if he was using it as a barrier between us.
“What’s going on?” he asked. “Who are those men out front?”
I went to the television to turn off the cartoon that was playing.
