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She cleared her throat and crossed her arms. “I’m not going to sit here and say that I should have immediately been happy, because I’d be lying.”
“Fair enough.”
“I care about you and when someone I care about gets involved with some random man, I’m going to be more curious than happy. I’m not sorry about that.”
“Rose!” Violet hissed and widened her eyes as she shot her sister a glare.
She rolled her eyes in response. “But it’s clear that he cares about you. I saw it that day he showed up here. I could see it in his eyes that there was no malicious intent there. I just worry about you.”
“And?” her sister prompted
“And… I love you. A lot. I want you to do what makes you happiest.”
“If doing Logan’s what makes you happy, then we’re all for it.” Violet winked.
I laughed and felt my cheeks heat, shaking my head as I stood up. Why we’d let this argument drag out, I had no clue. I just knew that I loved the Arden sisters, loved their brazenness and loved what they stood for. It seemed that Logan wasn’t the only one who’d lucked out. I did too.
I circled around my desk and wrapped them both into a tight hug, sniffling softly when I saw a tear roll down Violet’s cheek.
“Please tell me you both aren’t fucking crying,” Rose growled.
Violet and I laughed and when we pulled away we were both wiping our eyes while Rose rolled hers. “Unbelievable. You’re both so soft.”
I laughed as she walked out of my office. “You said you love me, though!”
“I lied,” she responded, but even I could hear the smile in her voice.
THAT WAS ARGUABLY one of the most exhausting shifts of my life. My legs ached from walking the dogs so many times and my fingers were stiff from being exposed to the cold for so long. But by the end of the day, after the sun had set, I’d gotten everything done and was ready to head out. After promising to call or text one of the sister’s when I got home, I was in the car and on my way.
There was still no sign of Nicole. It was all I could think about as I drove. No phone calls, no texts. Ronald had called to let us know the blood that was found in Conlon’s house belonged to Conlon, not her, and a twisted part of me was happy because I hoped she fought and clawed like hell to get away from him. But there was another part of me, a dark, negative part, that wondered what he’d done to her when she stopped fighting.
I refused to believe that she was dead, and it wasn’t something Logan and I even brought up because it wasn’t an option. Conlon had to have taken her somewhere, kidnapped her when she wasn’t acting as complacent as he wanted her to. That was the only explanation because the alternative was far too dark for me to comprehend.
With Christmas just around the corner, the stress was high. As much as we wanted Nicole to come home, we knew that it would be a Christmas miracle if she did.
The sky was pitch black and the road
s were dark as I drove toward Port James. It was already snowing, fat flakes falling against my windshield. They were predicting at least eighteen inches and it was giving me anxiety. All I wanted to do was get home.
My thoughts drifted to Logan. He texted me earlier and tried to convince me to let him pick me up, but I reassured him that I was fine to drive. I had to admit that the gesture was sweet just as much as I had to come to terms with the fact that I was no longer falling in love with Logan.
I wasn’t falling. I’d already crashed. I was head over heels, totally and completely, let’s get his and her towels in love with Logan. I don’t know when it happened, I don’t know why it happened, but it did. It was as though my heart found its counterpart with Logan’s, and there was no stopping it. I was overwhelmed, terrified. Excited. I’d never known what it was like to be in love with someone, to recognize that all consuming feeling. But here I finally was, embracing the craziness. Loving every second of it and holding on for the ride.
Though, it was one thing to admit it to myself and another thing to actually tell Logan how I felt.
Doubts flew through my head as I drove along the winding road. What if he didn’t say it back? What if he didn’t feel the same way at all? What if me telling him the truth pushed him away? I could play the “what if” game all I wanted, but I’d never know until I actually told him.
Which I was going to do.
Tonight.
I’d spent all day trying to muster up the courage, telling myself that there was nothing wrong with feeling how I felt and expressing it. Logically, I knew there was nothing wrong with being in love with someone. It was a part of life and people did it every day. But it was a whole different ball park when it was me who was in love. The feeling was foreign and the thought of actually saying those three little words made me sick to my stomach. But the thought of not saying them? The thought of keeping them bottled up inside me and buried in the depths of my heart? That made me feel like I was dying.
“I’m going to tell him,” I whispered firmly.
I was nearly home when I remembered I needed to stop and get coffee and eggs for the morning. Pulling into a small convenience store just outside of Port James, I parked my car off to the side of the building and jogged inside, the snow whipping at my face.
I squinted against the fluorescent lights as I made my way up and down the aisles, smiling politely when the young clerk approached me. He couldn’t have been older than seventeen with shaggy dark blonde hair.
