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Chapter Twenty
Dean followed Ruby back down the trail. Though they didnt talk, the forest was alive with sounds. Birds squawked and chirped in the trees overhead, squirrels chattered, water splashed.
At the park, he tossed the picnic basket-still filled with a lunch unpacked and uneaten-in the trash can. Curling the heavy blanket around his shoulders, he climbed tiredly onto his bike.
When they reached the summer house, he pulled off to the side of the road and got off his bike.
Ruby stopped a few feet ahead, then set her kick stand and turned to him, frowning. “I guess this is where I say good-bye. ”
He heard the crack in her voice and it gave him hope. Ruby could push him away from now until forever, and he would still know the truth. He could see it in her eyes, hear it in her tremulous voice. Hed felt it in her kiss. “For now. ”
“It was just a kiss,” she said. “Dont turn it into Gone with the Wind. ”
He took a step toward her. “You must have confused me with one of your Hollywood idiot-boys. ” She wanted to move backward; he could tell.
“Wh-what do you mean?”
Now he was close enough to touch her, to kiss her; but he stood perfectly still. “I know you, Ruby. You can pretend all you want, but that kiss meant something. Tonight well both lie in bed and think about it. ”
Ruby flushed. "You knew a teenager a decade ago. That doesnt mean you know me.
He smiled. It was so precisely the sort of thing she would have said at sixteen. "You might have built a wall around your heart, but you havent exchanged it.
Somewhere, deep inside, youre still the girl I fell in love with. " At last he touched her cheek, a fleeting caress.
He wanted to do more, to pull her into his arms, hold her close and whisper; I love you, but he knew he couldnt push her that far. Not yet.
“For years after you were gone, I thought I saw you,” he said quietly. “Every time I rounded a corner or came up to a stoplight or got off an airplane, Id think for a split second, There she is. Id run up to the person, tap her shoulder, and find myself smiling awkwardly at a stranger. I still walk on the right side of the sidewalk, because you like the left. ”
Her mouth trembled. “Im afraid. ”
“The girl I knew wasnt afraid of anything-”
“That girls been gone for years. ”
“Isnt there some part of her left?”
She stood there a long time, staring up at him, then finally she turned away.
He knew she wasnt going to answer. “Okay,” he said with a sigh. “Ill concede this round. ” He climbed onto his bike and started to go.
“Wait. ”
He stumbled off his bike so fast he almost fell. It clattered to the ground as he spun back to face her.
The way she was looking at him reminded him of when she was nine years old and she fell out of the oak tree on Finnegans farm . . . or when she was twelve and broke her arm skateboarding down Front Street.
She took a step closer and looked up at him. He couldnt be certain, but she looked ready to cry. “You sound so sure.
”
He smiled. “You taught me love, Ruby. Every time you held my hand when I was scared, or came to one of my ball games or left a note in my locker, I learned a little more about it. Maybe when we were kids, I took that for granted, but Im not a kid anymore. Ive spent a lot of years alone and every date I went on only proved again how special we were. ”
“My parents were special,” she said slowly. “You and Eric were special. ”
“So, your point is, love dies. ”
“An ugly, painful death. ”
