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“Remember when I relapsed?”
“But it’s not the same. That was back then. You’ve been on the up and up since, right?”
“Yeah, but I’ve gone to bars, been at people’s houses where they had everything an addict like me wants. Being too chill is a precursor for going under.”
“You sound like an addiction’s counselor,” he said with a dry laugh.
“Damn, I did. Didn’t I?” I exhaled a harsh breath and stared at him. “There’s an open narcotics meeting at eleven thirty.” I looked at my watch. “We can make it.” Ari hauled himself from the chair after I stood up. “And there’s this burger joint we can go to afterward. Where you going to be at?” I put my leather jacket on.
“The Holiday Inn.”
“You checked in?”
“I came straight from the airport. Manny put my shit in his closet, since it’s small in here.”
I nodded. “Stay at my house. You’ll get to meet my new dog, Riley.”
Mariska
Beth: Going to be at Chase’s tonight =)
Me: See you in the am.
AFTER I TEXTED BETH, I put my phone back into my bag, and looked around the library. For three days, I hadn’t run into Hunter. I remembered that he had classes on Monday and Thursdays. On Monday, I’d found out that his class had been cancelled when I’d passed by his classroom before I’d driven to work. Man, the library was practically empty this evening. My thoughts dashed back to Hunter’s rare charismatic grins and tall, strong build. When I’d first seen Chase in person, I thought that Beth had hit the jackpot, but Hunter had this presence about him that couldn’t be ignored.
As I exited the library, I heard my name and spun around, ungracefully colliding into Hunter. Laughing, he stilled my arms and shook his head. He’d cut his hair. I used to prefer guys to have short hair and dress formally, but I wished he hadn’t cut his hair. I looked at his shirt, slacks, and leather shoes, feeling like I was in front of a different guy. Why had he changed his look so drastically? Was he trying to be like Chase? He wasn’t wearing his leather jacket, or his jean jacket. His appearance was conventional, but the way his eyes lingered over me was anything but gentlemanly.
“I’ve been in that library since I finished my class this afternoon,” he said.
“Oh.”
“I got there just in time to get a table to myself. The party must have gone smoothly, ‘cause I didn’t hear anything from Chase.”
We were down the flight of stairs when I said, “Or it could be because no one’s seen you. Have you been at Lasting Impressions all week?”
“It’s been weird not seeing me, hasn’t it?” he asked and I was secretly happy that he and Jill hadn’t had the chance to go out together.
“Yeah,” I answered. “I’ve gotten back my appetite.” We started walking toward my residence hall.
“A friend of mine relapsed,” he told me in a serious tone and I reached for his hand, disliking the troubled expression that clouded his face. It was then that I knew how much older he was than most of us in terms of his life experience. While Hunter was as striking as the day that I’d met him, I’d missed some of the holes in his face and the sealed skin on his earlobes where he’d once worn earrings.
“Is your friend getting help?”
Hunter made a gesture in the affirmative. We quietly strolled until I sat down at the same bench where Scott and I had sat at on Saturday. I wanted to know if Hunter was really all right and if his friend’s setback was triggering him to relapse. God, I hoped that wasn’t the case. I wouldn’t even know what to do about that. Would Beth and Chase know what to do? Beth had told me that Chase just stopped smoking pot without getting professional help. Were alcohol and cocaine harder classes of drugs to kick?
“He’s in a thirty day inpatient program now. I’d driven him there at four this morning.”
Hunter’s frown deepened as he glanced down at my hands over his. I dropped my hand from his, settling it on the scant space between us. “Have you talked to Beth about it?”
“It’s been a hectic twenty-four hours, so I haven’t. The first thing I did after I dropped him off was shower and get dressed for my class presentation. I didn’t think I would’ve been able to do that and Dr. Mastrangelo wouldn’t have thought twice about deducting points because I didn’t come to class looking the correct way today.”
As I studied him, I wanted him here with me unless he preferred to be by himself. “I have some soda upstairs,” I told him. “You can tell me more about it…if you’re okay with it.”
***
WHEN WE WERE ON the second floor, I glimpsed around the hallway as I turned the key into my dorm room. I didn’t think that Hunter would’ve come up with me. I’d been afraid that he’d wouldn’t.
Hunter took a step closer and I could smell the light scent of his detergent and the gel he used to shape his thick newly short brown hair. He lifted my chin, and murmured my name, making me meet his gaze. “If you wanna back out now, just say the word. We can talk another time. I know you’re trying to be nice.”
