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“My heart, Ellie. You’re the only person who’s ever had my heart and the only one who will ever have it.”
Tears gather in my eyes, and I try my best to force them away, but some manage to slip through and tumble down my cheeks. Judge gently wipes them away with a soft touch.
I crack my eyes open and peer up at him. “Why didn’t you tell me? It hurt hearing it from them.”
He frowns. “Because I knew it would be difficult for you understand. The situation between me and them wasn’t the standard open relationship you see with some couples. We all cared for each other. I took care of their needs, just as they took care of mine. In more than just sexual ways. In a sense—” He pauses, his lips turning down. “—it was almost like a wife/husband relationship with each of them, except we didn’t share soul-deep love.”
I recoil, but he doesn’t let me go.
“Listen to me. What I mean is we provided affection for each other. I was there when they needed me and they were there when I needed them, in many different aspects. We were friends first and lovers second. Until you, I never wanted to have a permanent lasting relationship.”
I don’t know what to think anymore. I know there are men and women out there who have open relationships. I’ve just never understood how they could do it. Do I look down at those types of people? No. I’ve got no right to judge. I don’t know why it hurts to think of Judge as one of them. Maybe it’s the simple fact of actually meeting the women he’s slept with, knowing they’ve felt his incredible hands, kissed his amazing lips, had him hovering over them while he gives them pleasure. Thinking about it logically, I knew he must have slept with someone in Malus—it makes sense. But I wasn’t prepared to meet not one, but three of his exes.
“I just—” My chest rises with my deep breath, and I shake my head. “It just hit me hard. I hated hearing that about you.”
He smooths one hand through my hair until he’s palming the back of my head.
“I should have told you, but I knew you were already reluctant about moving here. I didn’t want to give you another reason to resent me.”
I close my eyes and let my head fall forward, hitting the center of his sternum. My chest still feels tight, but the pain isn’t as crippling. I’m still trying to get my head around him being with multiple women like that, but it’s something I’ll need to overcome. Besides, it’s in the past.
He tips my head back and stares down at me. “Are you good now?”
I nod against his hands on my cheeks. “I will be.”
He dips his head, and I close my eyes when his lips meet mine. My arms lock loosely around his waist, and I sigh into the kiss.
The door behind us opens, and I jerk away, silently cursing myself. Maisy still doesn’t know her dad and I are together, and I sure didn’t want her to find out this way.
I turn, prepared to explain things the best I can, but it’s Trouble standing there instead of Maisy. His expression is hard, his jaw clenched so tight, it’s a wonder his teeth don’t crack. At first I think it’s directed at me, but then his eyes move to Judge and the look intensifies.
“What is it?” Judge demands, his body going rigid.
His eyes flicker to me before going back to Judge. “Earl’s dead.” I suck in a sharp breath. “He was found with a broken beer bottle buried in the back of his neck behind The Hill.”
My body turns cold, and a shiver churns my stomach. Murder. Oh my God, someone was murdered. Here in Malus.
“Motherfuckin’ hell,” Judge spits harshly. “When?”
“He was found an hour ago, but Emo says he’s been dead for at least six hours.”
I feel the heat of Judge’s anger at my side and see Trouble’s on his face. I’m surrounded by fury, and it causes my insides to quake. Not that I blame them for their hatred.
“Wh-who’s Earl?” I stutter through numb lips.
“An old flirt who hangs out at The Hill all the time,” Judge answers. “Fuck. Has anyone told Birdie yet?”
“I just left her place. Eden and Remi are with her now.”
I swallow thickly. “How does Emo know he’s been dead for that long?”
Judge’s eyes flicker down to me. “He’s the coroner of Malus.”
Seeing the fear in my eyes, he takes my hand. I’m glad for the gesture, but I’m still chilled to the bone. I step closer to him until my torso is pressed against his side.
“Any clue what happened? Signs of a struggle? Any evidence?”
Trouble shakes his head. “JW and Emo are still there, but when I left, they hadn’t found anything except for his cell phone in his hand. JW’s name was pulled up on the screen, but whoever it was must have gotten to him before he could call. His last call was yesterday evening to Birdie. She said he left this morning to get wood to repair their porch. When he didn’t come back home, she figured he stopped by The Hill, as per usual.”
