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“Sure thing. If I’d known you wanted to go out on the town, I would have invited you sooner. I always thought you were more of a homebody.”
“I am… I was, but I’m trying to make a change.” I was grateful she was willing to include me and happy that she seemed pleased to have me join.
When Blake called me to his office at the end of the day, I told him about my plans to go out.
“I didn’t know you went out with the ladies,” he said.
“It’s a new thing. I’m trying to get out there. Live a little.”
“Good. I’m glad to hear it.” I waited for him to make a move, but he simply kissed me on the forehead. “Have fun.”
I frowned. Was he rethinking this thing with us too? Not that I thought he’d pressure me to stay and have sex, but he didn’t seem disappointed that I wasn’t going to spend time with him either.
I would go mad trying to figure him out.
The evening with the ladies was loud but fun. I learned all sorts of gossip about who was sleeping with whom, including Dylan and one of the accountants. Fortunately, there didn’t seem to be any rumors about me and Blake. They seemed like a group of ladies who would ask about it if there was.
The next morning, I woke and wanted to hide under the covers, that is until I needed to empty my stomach. I had drunk only a little. Maybe two glasses of wine. That wasn’t enough for a hangover. Clearly, I hadn’t recovered enough to go out. Still feeling unwell, but not nauseous anymore, I dragged myself to work. I had to be there for Blake’s presentation to the board about the France deal. If all went well, it would be signed and sealed next week.
I arrived at work and set out to get the conference room ready. I checked with Dana to make sure the coffee, fruit and Danish order was on its way. Then I went through the presentation papers, slides and reports to make sure all was in order for Blake.
Blake walked in, as he usually did, twenty minutes early. He liked to review everything one last time in the room.
He frowned when he saw me. “Did you overdo it last night?”
“That bad, huh?” I pressed a hand to my forehead.
“Just a little paler than usual.”
“The thing is, I didn’t drink that much. I think I’m just not fully recovered from the flu yet.”
He traced a finger along my cheek. “Do you need to go home?”
Moments like this, when he was being tender and caring, were when my heart was the most vulnerable. He will never love you, ran like a mantra through my head. “No. I’ll be fine. Plus, today is important.” I then showed him the reports the board would be getting, the notes I made for him, and the slideshow I set up.
By then, the rest of the board had arrived and sat around the table, with Blake at the head. I sat along the back wall behind Blake so I could hand him any supplemental materials he might need. Dana sat next to me taking notes.
The meeting progressed just as I’d planned. The board appeared pleased by the progress, especially at the financial projections for sales in France.
At one point, Blake asked me for the report that provided more details about the cost projections. I stood to hand him the report but before I was completely upright, the world tilted on its axis and then went dark.
I opened my eyes and stared into the gray eyes of the man I was hopelessly in love with. For a moment, I wondered if I’d died and gone to heaven. Blake Alexander was the man of my dreams and if heaven were a perfect place when I died, I’d be in his arms, with him loving me for eternity.
“I’ve called 9-1-1.” A voice informed Blake. I looked around and saw other faces, then it came to me. I wasn’t in heaven. I was in the boardroom of JoXander Cosmetics. I was laying on the floor although I wasn’t sure why. One minute I was upright, having just stood to bring a report to Blake, the CEO of JoXander and in the next, everything went black. Clearly, this wasn’t heaven and the concern I saw in Blake’s eyes wasn’t love or devotion.
Unrequited love was torturous. Sure, he cared for me. There must be some affection because I don’t think he’d touch me the way he did if he didn’t like me a little. But he didn’t love me. He would never love me. No, everything he had to give a woman had all been taken by his deceased wife.
My heart broke for him to have a love like he had with his wife taken away by cancer. At the same time, I was jealous of the woman who owned his heart and soul, even in death. Not meanly, my envy was tempered by my admiration for a man who could love so deeply and stay so devoted to his wife’s memory.
