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I stood and swiped away grass and dirt I didn’t see but felt the need to clean off anyway. My mind was full, wondering how Mandy was doing. If she was feeling frustrated or suffocated by all the love coming from Jana and Teddy. Wondering if she was really doing okay or if she was putting up a front, something I now knew she could do so well.
It was a damn shame that I had to give her up because she needed someone better than me in her life. She deserved someone better than I could ever hope to be and I knew that. I wasn’t cut out to be an old man to a hot chick. My mind was too fucked up. I could fuck her, and I could protect her. But true love and frou-frou relationships were out of my league.
And the moment that thought went through my mind, I realized exactly how much I wanted her.
C
hapter 19
Mandy
“We got you tons of stuff to keep you occupied until they spring you.”
Teddy beamed a smile as she and Jana unpacked the bags they set on the edge of my hospital bed.
I smiled as I watched them work in tandem, pulling out a stack of magazines, leave-in conditioner and a brush, moisturizer and a tablet.
“Wow,” was all I could say at their generosity, and even that hurt my ribs.
“The tablet is mine,” Jana said sheepishly, “but I know how hard it can be cooped up in here without anything to entertain you.” Her hand instinctively went to the scar along one side of her face. It wasn’t really noticeable until she drew attention to it, but we all had our quirks, so who was I to judge?
They were so cheerful, so upbeat that it made me suspicious. “What’s going on? Do you know something I don’t, like I’m dying or there’s a contract on my life?”
Teddy and Jana stared at each other with twin serious expressions and then promptly burst out laughing. “Sorry to break it to you Mandy but you’re going to live. This is called friendship. You need us, so we’re here. To help you forget just how much life sucks right now.”
That pulled a laugh from me.
“Understatement of the . . . well, fucking ever,” I managed to say before I had to count to ten to absorb the pain.
I shouldn’t be surprised about the shit show my life was now; it wasn’t like there had ever been a break when things were perfect. Hell, not even perfect. I’d have settled for uneventful. Boring, even. But that wasn’t the life lined up for me. “It does suck and I appreciate you bringing these things to me but I’m sure you both have better things to do than hang out here for the second day in a row.”
I had no clue when they would let me out and I hadn’t made a big deal about it yet because it didn’t matter to me where I was at the moment.
“See that’s where you’re wrong,” Teddy said with a sassy point of her finger. “We’re pregnant and hungry, and if one of these babies decided to come early, we’re right where we need to be.” She flashed that tough girl grin that was so far from the high fashion model she’d been that she was like a whole new person.
I appreciated her attempt to keep things light. “And I thought you were here just for me. I’m just a convenience,” I told her with a fake sniffle. “Thanks, seriously.”
“Don’t!” Jana held her hands up in my direction. “We’re here for you. You’re our friend and we want to be yours but if you keep that up you’ll have two pregnant women blubbering like babies in here.”
“Thanks for the heads up,” I told her, wincing as I tried to sit up.
“How are you feeling, really?” Teddy tilted her head to the side in that classic sign of pity that people thought was sympathy.
“Never better,” I told her flippantly. “Doesn’t matter, it’ll heal. Eventually.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Savior looked like he wanted to rip someone’s head off when we picked him up,” Teddy said. “He’s got it bad.”
I shook my head, refusing to listen. Maybe that’s how women talked when they were together but I didn’t want to hear it. “He’s got a bad case of guilt and obligation. That’s all it is.”
They both laughed like it was the funniest damn joke in the world. Teddy blurted out, “Oh Jana, she actually believes that.”
I glared at Teddy but it had no effect on the girl.
“It’s true, Teddy. He feels bad he didn’t look after me like he promised my brother. Thinks all of this is his fault.”
If there was one thing I hated, it was pity. And obligation. I was used to both and neither had ever done a damn thing to make me or my life any better.
“Don’t worry,” I told them as sleep slowly pulled me under. “I’m fine on my own.”
