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He didn’t.
* * *
Kyle arrived a half hour later and promptly placed a distressed Amsel in my shaking arms. He actually had to help me hold the baby.
I was in a lot of pain, but it seemed to radiate more in my chest, deep in my core, than in my leg, which was sufficiently patched and propped up while I lay on the sofa. Stan stuck close to me as Dr. Forrester did whatever needed to be done to Amano. His assistant came into the great room frequently to give an update, since I was desperate to know how it was all going.
Rosa tried to occupy herself in the kitchen, but couldn’t stay away for long, constantly checking in. I didn’t bust her for showing her soft side, for letting me slide on the pain-threshold level I lacked. She was also visibly upset over Amano’s condition, and in the back of my head I wondered if she’d grown fond of our fearless bodyguard. Wondered if the feeling was mutual, since Amano never seemed to mind sticking close to her when the heat was on.
Kyle said, “I know Kid has no idea what just happened, but the noise and bad vibes have him really worked up.”
I stared down at the gaping, squirming bundle in my arms. His little fists were in full swing, as were his tiny feet. He looked a bit flushed and that worried me.
“Can you get me a bottle?” I asked Kyle. “And then you need a hot shower and a hell of a lot of brandy. Dane’s best label is in the wine cellar off the study.”
“I don’t think I should leave you.”
“Stan will help me.”
“Ari.” Our eyes locked.
I could see how deeply disturbed Kyle was by everything that had happened this evening. Maybe everything that had happened since we’d first met—it’d likely all caught up to him, hit him hard tonight. The way I suspected it had Dane.
My insides twisted at the thought of him. I desperately needed him to come walking through the front door, but there was a part of me that feared he would not. He was devastated by the entire fucked-up scenario from start to finish. Worse was that he’d killed Ethan. And that Mikaela had contributed to the entire explosive situation—even the destruction of the Lux.
It had to be tearing Dane apart, destroying him.
I told Kyle, “This isn’t the way your life should be, Kyle. This is so bad and wrong. You should be out dating, meeting Meg and Sean for drinks, having fun.”
“Yeah, that’s totally me,” Kyle deadpanned. “Living it up, having the time of my life, all fun and games.”
“Kyle.” I let out a long breath. “That should totally be you.”
I stared several more seconds, my gaze unwavering. Then I asked, “Have you visited Amano in his medically induced coma? Do you really think I could handle it if that were you someday? I was devastated when I thought he was dead. And the feeling hasn’t changed even knowing he’s still alive.”
“He did what he was hired to do, Ari. He went after the bad guys.”
“And that’s how you feel about Price? It’s that cut-and-dried for you? Because he’s dead, Kyle.”
He grimaced.
“No. I didn’t think so,” I said. “You care about Amano and I know it has to crush you, too, to see him like this. And Agent Price—the two of you had become friends. So don’t play tough with me.”
“Okay, yeah, I’m hating this whole part!” He erupted. “But it was a damn good thing I was here. Even you have to admit that.”
A few tears crested the rims of my eyes.
He raked a hand through his hair in agitation. Then he leaned toward me and brushed the fat drops from my cheeks.
“You’re already a hero,” I told him. “Many times over. That’s not enough?”
“Come on, Ari. I never signed up for the carefree existence, remember? I had to deal with a major injury in order to keep playing ball, in order to keep my scholarship and get a college degree. I had to kick a very serious prescription-drug addiction. Goddamn it, Ari,” he ground out. His eyes blazed with emotion and intensity. “I did a lot of shit just to get through life. And what kind of life was it, anyway? My dad was hardly ever around. My mother had a newborn to focus on from the time I was nine. I raised myself. I didn’t have a family unit.”
“I understand that, but—”
“I do now,” he insisted with conviction. “I’ve been involved in something dangerous, yes. But also extraordinary. There’s a whole universe I never would have been exposed to if I hadn’t met you and Dane. Amano. And tonight, when that red dot was on Amsel’s forehead…?” He shook his head. The emotion deepened. “That was when I knew that what I’ve been doing has meaning, purpose. And that I am a part of a family. One I choose to be a part of. I belong here, protecting Amsel. You know it.”
My heart swelled. I nodded, because I couldn’t speak.
