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“I’d say you were mistaken.”
“What if I insisted?”
“I would politely decline.”
“Are you always this difficult?”
“I don’t think I’m being difficult at all.”
“And you like to argue too, huh? Does Ant know this about you? That you’re difficult and argumentative.”
“What exactly is your issue?”
“I don’t like you.”
“You don’t even know me.”
“Yeah I do. I’ve known guys like you my whole life.”
“Excuse me. Are you open?” said a thirty something gal in cut off sweats and a Pikachu tee.
Nikki rolled her eyes and spoke with an exasperated drawl. “Uh, can you wait a minute. We’re in the middle of something here.”
Romeo looked up at the sky and wondered aloud. “What is going on lately?” Then he addressed Nikki. “Maybe you should leave.”
“We’re not done here.”
“Done with what?”
“Done with our little talk.”
“What are you doing here?”
“I’m checking you out.”
“I’m going back to work.”
“Wait,” she said, grabbing his hand. “I’m sorry. It’s been a stressful morning. Let’s try this again.” She stepped back, struck the pose and said, “Hi. I’m Nikki.”
Instantly, her whole demeanor changed. She went from maliciously meddling bitch to sultry sex kitten in two seconds flat. Then she stepped forward again. Put her hand on top of his and stroked his fingers, slowly, intentionally. “Let’s start over.”
Meanwhile, as Nikki was inappropriately touching Romeo’s hand, Benny was powerwashing the garbage cans around the side of the building. When he finished those he continued on to the sidewalk nearby. He washed and walked and washed and walked, blasting the greasy, grimy, beef drippings, ketchup droppings, congealed cheese and pulverized french fried potatoes off the concrete, out into the street, and down into the waiting sewer drain.
Till he eventually turned the corner and stopped, dead in his tracks. One look and he knew. He knew that big juicy padunkadunk as soon as he saw it.
Romeo saw Benny. Looking his way. Staring. At something. The water still shooting out of the pressure hose. Hitting nothing. Puddling and pooling on the sidewalk before cresting over the curb and running off into the street. But he really didn’t know what he was staring at.
Nikki did. She’d followed Romeo’s eyes right to Benny’s and she knew exactly what he was looking at. It’s what all the boys looked at.
“Seriously?” she asked in her most sarcastic, over the shoulder, I’m all that and a bag of chips that you’ll never have voice.
Benny didn’t hear her though, over the din of the power washer. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway. He was mesmerized. So much so that he stopped paying attention to what he was doing and accidentally hosed down an angry looking lawyer in a seersucker suit and cornflower tie.
“Listen. You’re right,” Nikki said. “I don’t really know you.” She stroked Romeo’s hand again, then moved up his arm a bit. “But we could change that if you like. You and I could spend a little time together.” Then she struck the pose, again. The one where she tilted her head, pushed out her breasts and opened her mouth just a little bit. The one that always
worked.
“Any chance we could order?” asked the man standing behind the woman still standing behind Nikki.
