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“I don’t want to talk about it.”
A pause.
“Okay. But we’re still going to study, right? I’ll see you on Monday?”
I shrugged. At the moment I didn’t want to do anything but stare across the water and wallow in being a lame and sorry ass. A few more moments of silence passed, and I began to think about what had just happened. And with those thoughts came a bit of shame.
“I guess you’re probably not used to the kind of scene you just saw at my house.” I watched her closely, trying to gauge her reaction. She tucked a long piece of hair behind her ear and chewed on her lower lip for a few seconds. I’d noticed it before, but man, the girl had a nice mouth.
“You’d be surprised,” she whispered.
“Really?” I somehow doubted that. The Jenkinses were the poster family for Pleasantville, USA.
“Really,” she repeated, turning fully so that she was facing me. She was inches away, and that sweet summer smell was all over me. I had to give Everly props for making me totally forget the reason I was out here in the first place, because right now, in this moment, all I could think about was how soft her mouth looked.
And how amazing she smelled.
She licked that incredible mouth, and I thought that maybe she was nervous.
“I’m no different from anyone else. My family is no different. In fact, you’d probably be shocked if you knew the truth.” Her voice caught, but she cleared her throat. “We’re all hiding something, Trevor. None of us are perfect.”
There was something in her voice, some small bit of hurt that bled through her words, and I couldn’t take my eyes off her.
“What are you hiding?” I asked before I could help myself.
She gave a small shrug. “Meet me at the library on Monday and maybe I’ll tell you.”
We stared at each other for a long time. How long? I’m not sure, but it was long enough for the swans to get curious and make their way over to our side of the pond. Long enough for small beads of sweat to glisten across her forehead.
And long enough for me to realize that I wanted to kiss her. Like, really kiss her. Skin and tongues and heat. The old me would have made a move, confident of the outcome. But this new me wasn’t so sure about anything anymore, so I did nothing.
“Do you want a ride back?” she asked eventually.
“Nah,” I replied. “I think I’m going to hang here for a bit. Pretty sure Mom and Taylor are going to go at it for a while.”
A pause.
“Do you feel like company?”
I couldn’t help but smile, and I liked how her cheeks got red when I did. “Only if that company is you.”
She blushed harder, and her eyes moved away as she whispered, “Okay.”
I relaxed back onto the bank, and Everly did the same, her body so close to mine that I felt the heat coming off her skin. I closed my eyes, inhaled her fresh clean smell, and for the first time since I’d woken up, I felt some kind of peace.
Chapter Eight
Everly
One of my earliest memories is sitting on my mother’s knee, there in the first row at church, watching sunlight stream in from outside to halo my dad’s head as he gave his sermon. The beams were like little pieces of heaven, and I was convinced they came straight from God to bathe my father in his goodness.
Because in my young mind, my father was good and strong. He was the guy who hugged me as much and as often as I wanted. Kissed me on the nose and called me his sweets. He was the man who tucked me into bed and read The Velveteen Rabbit over and over and over again because I asked him to.
My dad was that guy. The man all my friends loved, the man who was bigger and stronger and smarter than anyone else I knew. His voice was love and his eyes were promise.
He was so handsome that a smile or a touch on the shoulder made most women giggle like little schoolgirls. My mom used to tease him about it. She called it the Pastor Factor. And she said that it wasn’t just his charisma and charm that filled our church each and every Sunday. It was his ready smile and the way he could make anyone feel special just by looking at them.
She had a point, but I always thought it was my father’s voice that drew people in. Like he had some magical quality that hypnotized and cajoled until you couldn’t help but agree and say amen and sing his praises.
