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ay from me… to celebrate it with me… I’m sorry that I can’t be the woman you want, but…’
‘You are the woman I want,’ Mark contradicted her fiercely. ‘I made a mistake… I admit it. Punish me for it if you want to, Deb, but don’t punish yourself as well… There was something else I came here to tell you…’
He paused and then continued, ‘This partnership I’ve been working in is up for sale. I want to buy it. All right, I know what you’re thinking and you’re right; it’s a small country practice that will just about earn me a living, and there won’t be any glory or power; but those aren’t the things I want. Life in the fast lane isn’t for me… not because I’m not good enough but because it simply isn’t my choice. I know myself now, Deb, and I know what’s right for me.
‘I’ve been working at this practice long enough now to know that I’d forgotten what it felt like actually to enjoy my work… to get a real feeling of satisfaction out of it, to enjoy the contact I have with other people, to wake up in the morning and look forward to the day ahead. And if in Ryan’s eyes and those of men like him that makes me a failure, then so be it. I certainly don’t feel any less of a man for having different goals from them…’
‘Nor should you,’ Deborah agreed. Mark was right; her heart had started to beat too heavily. What was he going to suggest—that she join him in his country idyll? But to her such an existence would be a trap, a dead end. She could feel her eyes filling with tears and for the first time in her adult life she came close to wishing she were different, that Mark and his love were all she wanted.
‘It sounds perfect for you, Mark.’
‘But not for you.’
It was, she realised, a statement and not a question.
‘No,’ she agreed sadly, ‘not for me… I need more than that… I’m not like you. I like to be challenged… stretched; I need a job that takes me out into the world, not shuts me away from it…’
‘Yes. And that’s one of the reasons I came to see you. I have a client, a woman… a very, very successful woman who’s looking for someone to work alongside her as her second in command——’
‘A company accountant?’ Deborah interrupted him. ‘Oh, Mark, I don’t think I——’
‘No… she already has a company accountant… Stephanie is an empire-builder and what she wants is a colonel-in-chief to check out the land ahead of her, so to speak, and to guide her through its dangers.’
‘And she wants me for this job…’
Mark paused.
‘No—well, no… as a matter of fact she wanted me,’ he told her ruefully. ‘She isn’t very keen on the idea of working with another woman, especially one young enough to suddenly decide that she wants to trade in her career for motherhood…’
‘What?’ Deborah turned round angrily. ‘Is it any wonder that women find it too hard to climb the career ladder when our own sex-?’
‘Of course, I told her that you might not even want the job,’ Mark went on. ‘After all, it’s a pretty big step to move out of the comparative security of the profession for industry; no one would blame you if you felt wary about wanting to take on that kind of challenge.’
Deborah was thinking furiously. It was impossible, of course. Work for another woman… another woman who already seemed ambivalent about employing her… who would have preferred Mark… Give up her career plan of working in the profession…
She couldn’t do it; she would be a fool even to think of doing it.
She turned round to tell Mark as much, but he was standing so close to her that she walked right into his arms.
‘Mark, no. Stop it…’ she mumbled under his kiss.
‘Why not come and find out for yourself?’ he suggested softly.
Deborah looked at him with narrowed eyes. ‘It won’t work,’ she warned him. ‘I know what you’re trying to do, Mark, but life isn’t like that; it doesn’t come with fairy-tale endings.’
‘It’s OK,’ he told her straight-faced. ‘I know what you’re thinking. It is a big step to take; you’d only have yourself to rely on, no professional back-up team to fall back on and blame if things go wrong, and Stephanie does set almost impossibly high standards, expecting everyone to be as enthusiastic about her company as she is herself, expecting them to give the total commitment she gives it. She’d drive you as hard as she drives herself and expect you to make the kind of decisions I admit I wouldn’t want to make. You’d be out there on your own, and it would be one hell of a risk to take——’
‘What are you trying to say?’ Deborah interrupted him indignantly. ‘That I’m not good enough for this woman?’
She stopped abruptly, eyeing him suspiciously when she saw the amusement in his eyes. Laughter struggled with irritation, a wry smile curling her mouth. ‘All right. You always did know how to wind me up,’ she complained ruefully.
‘At least come and meet Stephanie,’ Mark urged her.
‘It won’t work,’ Deborah repeated, forced to mumble the words through his kiss.
‘It will if we want it to,’ Mark insisted. He lifted his mouth from hers and studied her face. ‘Isn’t what we have together worth at least giving it a try?’ he asked her emotionally.
Deborah drew a shaky breath. ‘I’m not promising anything,’ she warned him. ‘Your Stephanie and I will probably loathe one another at first sight.’ But she was smiling as she said it, her body warm and fluid as he drew her back into his arms.
