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Alessio stares out over the water, unmoving, and I think he’s trying to remember who he is too. When he finally turns, approaching me with empty eyes, terror chokes the air from my lungs. He’s reverting to what he knows, his ability to dissociate more powerful than my own. I can see it in the mechanical way he unties my wrists and tosses me a notepad and pen from his bag, staring down at me with disgust.
“Why?” he demands.
My throat burns with emotion, but I know it doesn’t matter what I tell him. He’s not here to listen or accept my explanation. He thinks he wants it, but there’s nothing I can say to make him feel better about what happened.
She tried to kill me.
“Bullshit,” he snarls. “You destroyed my security system. You cut the power to the house and used a signal jammer. There was something you didn’t want me to see. Tell me what it was.”
I shake my head in denial, but he’s already made up his mind.
“Where did you get the poison, Natalia?” He leans down into my face, his biceps rippling with rage. “Who the fuck are you working for?”
I release a stuttered breath. There’s no deceiving him now. He accepted my half-truths before, but he’s done playing this game, and I’m tired of lying too.
I’m not working for anyone, and the poison wasn’t mine. If it were, I’d have nothing to lose by admitting it now. I’m not a spy, Alessio. I have no idea how your security system works, but Gwen did.
“Lie to me one more time.” He stares at me with hollow eyes, slowly removing a pistol from the holster at his side.
I’m not proclaiming my innocence. I’ll admit freely that I came here to destroy you and your kingdom. I intended to take back my life and I didn’t care who I had to kill to do it. That included you. Especially you. Because you were always my biggest threat. Except, when it came down to it, I couldn’t do it. I didn’t know who you were when I made those plans, but I know now. Having feelings for you wasn’t in the cards, but it happened regardless. So many times, I thought about telling you the truth, but Gwen figured out who I was. And then, I had no choice.
“Who, Natalia?” he demands. “Tell me who the fuck you’re supposed to be.”
I dip my head, choking on my thoughts as I try to avoid his gaze. But he grabs me by the throat, wrenching my head back as he shoves the pistol into my mouth, gnashing it against my teeth.
“I can’t believe a goddamned word you say.” His fingers dig into my flesh. “You don’t talk to me about your fucking feelings because it’s all bullshit. There is one thing I’d like to know, though. Do you like sucking on this as much as you liked my cock in your mouth? You filthy fucking liar.”
I sob silently, torn apart by the grief radiating from him. He isn’t just angry. His hand is shaking as he tries to hold onto me, and his voice is raw. I thought he was empty, but I was wrong. I was so wrong. Alessio is full of emotions, and they are spilling all over me.
“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t.” He cocks the pistol and stares deep into my eyes. “One fucking reason, Natalia.”
I swallow, carefully moving my hand up to his. He allows me to retreat slightly, and I push past the pain in my broken vocal cords as I force them to cooperate.
“Because I’m Nino’s mother.”
20
Alessio
Her choked voice startles me, and it’s so faint, I thought I misheard her. But after several moments of replaying it in my mind, I realize I couldn’t have.
I’m Nino’s mother.
I dissect her words, staring deep into the eyes that have betrayed me for months. I think she could have told me anything else, but the conviction in her gaze is more painful than I thought it could be. I realize now she’s not just a liar, she’s insane. She’s literally fucking insane.
“You aren’t Nino’s mother.” My fingers fall away from her as I remove the pistol from between her lips.
I feel like I’ve been shot in the chest all over again. Everything aches. It aches so much, the only logical thing to do is put her down like a rabid animal. Insane or not, I can’t forgive her for what she’s done, but I can see that she believes it. She believes in her twisted mind that this is her reality.
I try to make sense of it, but I can’t. I can’t accept this as the reason. I need more from her. I need to understand the path she took to arrive at this conclusion. I need to know what drove her to destroy me this way.
