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“Well...” The loose thread on my comforter was suddenly the most interesting thing in the world. I tugged hard on it. “I mean...we did kiss.”
Charlotte gasped next to me. “You did? How was it?”
I couldn’t help but smile. “Aaa-mazing. Other worldly. He’s as good as he looks. I’m pretty sure I still haven’t come back down to the ground.”
She grinned. “I’ll bet. When Hunter kissed me for the first time, I couldn’t hardly stand, my knees were so weak.”
I turned toward her, barely able to contain the exhilaration in my voice. “I guess that’s the good part about kissing while you’re lying on the grass, looking at the stars. You don’t need your knees.”
Her eyes went all starry. “You guys kissed while you were star-gazing? That’s so romantic.”
“It was. He is.” I sighed. “I didn’t know he was coming over. We played soccer today on the set when they had to pause shooting because of a malfunction. Afterwards, he told me he wanted to talk tonight in private, so I thought I would stay home and wait. Him showing up was an added bonus. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”
“Sounds way better than a chick flick anyway,” Charlotte said with a wave of her hand. Relief washed over me. I was hoping she wouldn’t be offended that I skipped girl time tonight. “We just wanted to make sure you were feeling better. Right, Beth?”
I glanced up at Beth to see her still glaring at me as if I’d shut off her game system in the middle of a campaign. A familiar pang of guilt sliced through my happiness, resettling in my gut with a thunk. This was why I never lied. Not only was I terrible at it, but it made me feel awful. Having Beth look at me like that was seriously raining on the parade that Zane’s lips had started.
“I’m sorry, Beth,” I said, biting on my lower lip. Whatever it took: groveling, begging, crying, I do it to let her know how sorry I was. “I know I said I would avoid him, but it’s just been impossible. I like him too much. And he likes me.”
Her frown deepened. “If he likes you so much, why doesn’t he take you out on a real date?”
She knew why. I wasn’t sure why we had to go over this again. “With the contract thing, we had to be extra careful—”
“Sounds to me like he’s using you.”
“Beth...” Charlotte’s voice was soft and pleading as indignation rolled over me.
I huffed and shook my head. “He’s not using me. I would know if he was using me.”
Nope, the crying and pleading plan was out the window. Irrational anger toward my supposed friend had taken its place.
Beth shifted in her chair and stubbornly jutted her chin out. “Are you sure he’s really not allowed to date, or is that some line he fed you so that he didn’t have to commit? Maybe he does this to every innocent girl he meets just so he can have an excuse when he leaves you high and dry.”
“He’s not like that,” I argued, turning to Charlotte for help. “He’s not. You saw him.”
She squirmed under my gaze and picked at a piece of fuzz on her jeans. “I mean, he seems for real, but what Beth said does sound possible. Maybe he’s a player in disguise and this is his way of getting around. It is kind of the perfect excuse not to commit, if you think about it. Make girls think he can’t date and then snog them anyway.”
Who was she to judge Zane? She didn’t know him. She hadn’t listened in on our phone conversations when Zane shared some very real parts of his past with me. He was the furthest thing from a player there was.
I walked angrily to my window and shut it tight. How much I wished that Zane was still out there and able to defend himself to my so-called friends. He would set them straight.
“I don’t care what you guys think,” I said, turning back to them. “I trust him. He’s legit.”
They hadn’t been there. They hadn’t seen the way he’d looked at me, so full of devotion and sweetness. They hadn’t felt the way his fingers had lovingly caressed my scarred cheeks. If they had, we wouldn’t be having this fight right now.
“Come on, you can’t say he’s for real.” Beth rolled her green eyes. “I mean, how much do you actually know about him?”
“I know that I know more about guys than either of you,” I snapped back, feeling all the reserve I had left fade away. A splitting headache had formed in the spot between my eyebrows. “At least I admit when I like someone. You walk around typing on that phone of yours all day, unable to admit to anyone that you’ve got a guy on the line, too. At least mine is real. He’s here. Where’s yours? He’s probably a sixty-two-year-old man posing as a teenage boy, but you wouldn’t know the difference because unlike me, you’ve never had a boyfriend. So you have no right to judge me.”
Her head snapped back as if I’d slapped her. All the breath left my lungs and I stood frozen to the ground as regret coursed through my veins. Of course, I didn’t mean that. I didn’t mean any of it. But my apology remained lodged in my thickening throat.
“You know what, I think I’m going to skip girls’ night,” Beth said calmly, standing up to brush off the front of her jeans. She threw me a hurt look and then glanced at Charlotte. “If you want a ride home, I’ll be waiting in the driveway.”
The next second, she was gone, leaving me feeling like the worst friend in all eternity. My shoulders slumped and I tried to blink bac
k the scorching tears in my eyes. Should’ve stuck to the pleading and crying plan.
“I gotta go, before she leaves me stranded.” Charlotte rose to her feet. She took a tentative step toward me, placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed lightly. “We’re just looking out for you, Lex. I’m sorry if you felt attacked, but we were a little shocked to see you guys together. Especially when you asked us to help you stay away from him. You’re risking so much. Beth just wants to make sure this boy is worth it.”
