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Steven knew just how much this would push on my boundaries. He had thought about this.
The blond guy dropped a laugh that sounded all the more awkward for how it echoed in the space. “Don’t usually need an introduction service or anything, Steve. Why can’t you help her out?”
“She’s a nasty little bitch,” said Steven, no hesitation. “You know what they say about not sticking your dick in crazy… well, I try not to get it wet in nasty too many times either.”
Daniel did a bad job of stifling his own laugh. “Nasty can be fun.”
“You’re thinking a different type of nasty there, Dan,” said the blond.
“Well, shit,” Daniel said. He winked at me. “She’s not bad-looking, I’d be up for it if she is.”
I needed to say no, I wasn’t like that, they should leave me alone. But my head had gone down; I couldn’t even look at them. I couldn’t deal with being discussed like this, a mere object to be fucked, a piece of trash.
I didn’t want the thought that came into my head, but there it was: had Mum felt this way when she found out her husband wasn’t faithful to her?
“This is too weird,” whined the blond guy. “Can we just get the fuck out of here?”
Daniel punched him in the arm. “At least let’s hear a bit more about the situation.”
Steven shrugged. “What more is there to talk about? Take her around the back and give her a good double-teaming so she stops hanging around annoying the fuck out of me. If she struggles a bit just hold—”
“Steven, what the fuck do you think you’re doing?”
My head came up pretty fast at that voice and I staggered backwards, nearly colliding with Lucas. A pair of arms slipped around me—I flinched at first, but then I recognised the rancid stench of the perfume Callie had been wearing that week because she didn’t want to tell Lucas how much she hated his gift. I leaned into her, aware now of just how much I was shaking.
Daniel and the other guy ducked past Lucas on a rapid track to the exit. Steven had his arms folded and his neck crooked like he was getting a telling-off from a teacher. “Fuck off, Lucas, I didn’t invite you for a reason.”
I couldn’t see Lucas’s face well from my current position, but his posture was more aggressive than usual. “Seriously Steven, what are you doing? Do you want to get yourself in trouble?”
He sounded so bewildered, like Steven was some perfectly good guy for whom hurting a woman was out of character.
Lucas didn’t know about the restraining order. He didn’t know about what Steven had done to that girl.
How was that even possible? Steven certainly hadn’t managed to keep me a secret.
“I think you should get out of here,” said Lucas, and stood stiff while Steven sidled forward. He passed near to Callie, trying to bump me with his elbow as he passed.
Once he was gone, Callie let go of me and turned on Lucas. “What is up with him?”
“As if I fucking know.”
One of the library assistants whose name I couldn’t remember was suddenly tapping me on the shoulder. “Excuse me, you can’t carry on like this in the library.”
She couldn’t even remember my name, could she? “Why do you assume I’m the one responsible for this?”
Lucas stepped between us. “Sorry to disturb.” The woman blinked at the unexpected faceful of Lucas Starling charm. Lucas grabbed Callie’s hand, and Callie grabbed my wrist. “We’ll be going now,” Lucas added, and led us like a really twisted centipede out into the corridor outside the library.
He touched Callie’s shoulder. “Are you good to keep an eye on Tamara? I’m going to go swing a punch or two at Steven.”
“You are not,” said Callie, “he’ll swing back and you’ll mess up your face.” Lucas touched the side of his face where he’d been injured in an accident a few months before. “Be careful, okay?”
He kissed her forehead and strode out. I could barely look at Callie. She was just about glowing.
“Why did you come looking for me in the first place?” I asked.
The question took that goopy look off her face quickly enough, at least. “I got the strangest message from your mother, I didn’t even realise she had my number.” She pulled out her phone and showed me a long text in Mum’s usual stream-of-consciousness style. I felt my head start throbbing just thinking about actually reading it from cover to cover, but I was able to skim the general point: she thought I might be in a fragile state of mind and getting myself into a dangerous state, and could Callie find some time to look out for me. That was totally Mum’s style: find someone else to harass me on her behalf without telling them exactly what was going on.
Well, she’d gotten lucky there because at some point I’d made the decision to not involve Callie in what was currently going on in my life. A bit of mistrust from everything that had gone on before, a bit of a need to guard myself from potential outside interference.
