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Rachel stays in my arms but nods her head. “Okay.” Turning back to me, she asks, “Do you want to stay?”
I’m torn as I look at her. She might have agreed to her father but I’m not sure it’s what she really wants. At the same time I want to see my parents and eat dinner with them. So I thin
k up a compromise. “We’ll eat an early dinner and then head back, okay?”
Her gaze drops to my shirt and she stays silent, which makes me feel like a fool for forcing her to stay when I know it isn’t really what she wants.
26
Rachel
I feel such a baby crying all over Alexander, but I really have had enough. It’s not really just today, but a few things that finally brought me to tears. I’m missing talking to my sister, and I’m sure the heat is affecting me in some way. I haven’t been sleeping properly because my brain won’t shut down the arguments I’m having in there with Paige. Then today was the icing on the cake really.
I love my dads and I know they were playing with Alexander and I, but they’d unintentionally ruined the day for me. I’d wanted to wander around on Alexander’s arm with our families. That never happened.
Alexander wants to spend time with his parents, which I understand, but I’m too annoyed at mine to want to hang around.
Which is why I’m lying to Alexander for the first time. “I’m going to go and wash up in the restrooms. I’ll catch up to you.”
“I’ll come with you,” he offers.
I shake my head and force the smile to reach my eyes. “You can’t come in with me, so I’d rather catch up to everyone than have you waiting.”
He glances off into the distance to where they wait for us and then back to me. “If you’re sure.”
“I am.” I reach up and kiss his cheek. “I love you.”
Before he can reply, I’m jogging toward the restrooms before I slow to a walk as I approach. Quickly glancing around, I don’t see my family, so I take the path to the right of the restrooms and make my way out of the gardens.
Guilt builds inside of me because I’ve never just up and disappeared on anyone before, but today, I don’t know. Something isn’t right, and I don’t want to be a part of anything right now.
The closer I get to the apartment, the more edgy I become. So I find my phone and message Alexander: Don’t worry about me. X
My phone rings and rings, which I ignore in my pocket, and then a message beeps, followed by another and another.
Letting myself into the apartment, I stand with my back against the closed door and look around wondering what to do next. I should have stayed and faced everyone instead of running away.
I’m not going to lie though—the air conditioning and the peace make it worth coming back here alone. My eyes focus on the unmade bed through the small entryway, and it looks so enticing.
My purse slips out of my hands and then I’m lying on the bed staring up at the ceiling. I take my phone from my pocket and turning onto my side, I open it up to messages from Alexander.
Where are you?
Rachel?
Are you at the apartment?
Rachel, I’m going crazy.
I love you.
Tears come to my eyes and I do something that I’ve avoided until we’re at home; I call my sister.
It takes a few minutes for her to answer but when she does her voice sounds so far away. I mean I know she is, but she sounds different.
“Paige, are you all right?” I ask, concerned.
“I can’t talk to you right now,” she replies and I can’t control the gasp and the tears that fill my eyes again. “Rachel, what’s wrong?” she quickly adds. “I didn’t mean to … I don’t know.” Paige sighs. “I can’t do anything right lately, and now you’ve called me and I’ve made you cry.”
