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Her pause was excruciatingly long.
“It’s happened, hasn’t it? I knew, when you quit texting, but I just didn’t want to admit it. You’ve moved on. I’m no longer good enough for you.”
“You’re good enough for anyone, Ella, and don’t you ever forget that. And I will never move past being your friend. I just don’t want to marry you.”
He’d already told her that. A few days ago. And what he’d promised her was that he’d be there for her.
“If you’re ever in trouble, if you ever need anything, you call me and I’ll be there for you. I promise.”
“You really do mean that, don’t you?”
“Yes.” His breathing came easier.
“You’re a good person, Mark Heber.”
“I don’t feel like one at the moment.”
“Because you aren’t head over heels in love with me?”
“Maybe.”
“I’m not head over heels in love with you, either.” Her words shocked the hell out of him.
And a lot of the guilt, too.
“You’re too good for me...”
“Don’t start that again.”
“No, hear me out.” He heard the clink of a bottle as she paused and knew that she’d started drinking. “You are too good for me, Mark. As in too Goody Two-shoes. It’s too hard living up to you. I like to let loose, have fun, forget about other people sometimes.”
He knew that about her. He’d always admired her ability to let go. “You don’t ever hurt anyone,” he told her.
“No, but I don’t be
nd over backward for them like you do, either. I’ve tried, but it just doesn’t come naturally to me. And I’m tired of trying so hard. I just want to be me.”
“Then why did you say you wanted to marry me?”
“Because you’re hot. And you’re going to be the greatest husband to whatever woman you marry.”
“You still planning to stay sober?”
“Of course. Rick don’t drink. Remember, I told you he took me to a church thingie?”
“You still seeing him, then?”
“I was till I thought I was pregnant. He’s not you, but I have more fun when I’m with him.”
“Do you love him?”
“I don’t know. Maybe I will once I get you out of my system.”
“Does he love you?”
“Yeah. He tells me almost every night. Or he did until I ended things.”
“You think you’ll be able to patch things up?”
