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“When my neighbor said I should go inside because someone was being suspicious and sitting in a vehicle he didn’t recognize, I couldn’t help but think of my friend, FC. I couldn’t believe it when he told me the make and model of the car. And I really can’t believe my eyes right now.” She opens the door wider. “What are you doing here?” She squints her eyes to study me. “You lied to me about being okay, didn’t you?”
“Yeah.”
Idaline sighs, but holds out her hand. “Come on. We might as well go inside.”
I first notice that FC isn’t walking quite like he normally does, as if he’s in some discomfort. Then, when we get inside, he eases himself back slowly until his back touches the cushions of the couch.
“FC, what’s wrong with you?”
He thumbs to his back. “I got hurt while working. Look, Idaline, I didn’t intend to come here. I decided to go for a drive, get away from home, and next thing I know, I’m
here and spying on you.” He dips his head to study his lap. “Hope everything is okay with you and Justin.”
Great. He saw part of our argument. Ever since Justin told me he loves me, he’s been alternating between patiently and impatiently waiting for me to say it back. Tonight, he was extra impatient because he was apparently expecting me to say I love him on Christmas Day and he was already annoyed with me because I’ve been preoccupied with worry over FC. This feeling I had had nagged me all day that something was wrong with FC and that I needed to call him. The longer I ignored it, the louder it got and the more I worried. I had to call him. However, FC stayed on my mind long after I talked to him because I didn’t believe that he was actually okay.
So, Justin was mad about that and it constantly came up how he loved me and I apparently didn’t love him. I keep telling him I’m not going to rush myself into saying something until I’m certain of my feelings and I’m simply not certain yet. He doesn’t understand how I don’t know for sure at this point. I don’t know either, but that’s the way it is.
And that’s how I lost my boyfriend right before the new year.
“Do you want something to drink?” I ask. FC winces as if I just slapped him. “What is it?”
“I relapsed recently,” he admits. “I almost don’t regret it either.”
That doesn’t sound like a positive thing to say after a relapse.
“I’m not ruining your life by showing up here, am I?”
“You’re always welcome, Festus Camry.”
FC grants me the most handsome smile I’ve seen in a while. “You think I might be named after a car?”
I shrug. “How do I know your family doesn’t have some kind of history with Toyotas?”
FC grunts a little as he leans over to hug me. “Don’t hug me back because I’m still sore and sensitive, but I had to at least give you a hug. I’m glad I’m here even if I didn’t mean to show up.” He pulls away with a smile.
“How have you been sleeping?” He seems okay, but not exactly comfortable.
“On my stomach or on my side,” he answers simply.
I shake my head as I stand. “Come on.” Without waiting to see if he’ll follow, I walk to my bedroom and lie on my stomach, stuffing a pillow under my head. I hear footsteps shuffling closer within a few seconds.
“Trying to get me in bed already, Idaline?” he teases while he grits and clenches his jaw in order to climb into bed.
“Yeah, because you’re so sexy while you’re injured. What did you even do to your back? Do you want me to take a look at it?”
“I’m fine. Why don’t you tell me what I’ve missed?”
“I don’t want to talk about how things have been,” I tell him.
FC frowns. “That doesn’t sound good.”
“Mr. Fish is still alive,” I say happily, glancing down the bed toward where my fish sits on a dresser on the opposite wall.
“He’s a strong, determined little swimmer,” FC says with a hint of laughter in his voice. “What did you do for Christmas?”
“The usual. Seeing my family. How was time with your family?”
“It was good, relaxing.” He doesn’t mention Lila being there. Does that mean he’s still with her? “Can I spend the last day of the year and the first day of the year with you?” he asks.
