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“Do you want to come over and set it up with us?” FC asks as we’re checking out.
“I should probably go home. I have a therapy appointment and my interview tomorrow,” I remind him, though I would love to go with him. But how am I supposed to get used to my new apartment if I’m spending the nights at his house? And…and…I’m sure there are more reasons why I shouldn’t go. Why I feel this way, who knows.
“I’ll worry about you if you don’t come.”
“I can take care of myself.”
He sighs as he pushes the cart toward the exit, while I now hold Sawyer. “I know you can take care of yourself.” But things are awfully
quiet as he drives me to my apartment. He finds a free parking space as close as he can and then turns toward me in his seat. “Just remember that we don’t live in two different states anymore. We’re only five minutes away from each other. If you need me, you call me or come over.”
“I know. No more hiding or running away, I promise.”
His smile is relaxed and happy. “I’d walk you to the door, but…” He tilts his head toward the backseat where Sawyer has nodded off.
“I’ll be fine.”
“Text me when you’re safe inside.”
That I can do. After a breathtaking kiss, I head inside.
“I’ve read over the notes from Mrs. Judith, but I would like to hear from you,” Mr. Tucker says. “Tell me a little about yourself, your anxieties, and what brings you to Raleigh.”
All I can do is stare at him for a moment. My heart is boomeranging around my chest, trying to find a way out. I didn’t really know who I was seeing today, and I didn’t realize I would be as caught off guard as I am right now. Before I can think about it, I blurt out what’s sort of troubling me. “You’re a man.”
Mr. Tucker, a man at least fifty years old, chuckles. “Yes, ma’am, I am.”
“I’m sorry. I’m just used to seeing women. It’s happened that way with all my doctors and you’re throwing me off here.” He’s actually giving me anxiety. Will it be different for some reason? Will he be less sympathetic? Is he as good at his job as Mrs. Judith? Why am I even thinking these things?
“Don’t worry about it, Idaline. If it makes you feel any better, I know Judith personally and that’s how you ended up here. She trusts me to take good care of you and that’s what I plan to do.”
“You know her?”
Mr. Tucker nods and even smiles. “She’s my sister-in-law.”
And just like that, a whoosh of relief leaves me. I think back to what he asked of me and begin to talk. By the end of my first session, I decide I like him. Knowing that he knows Mrs. Judith and she trusts him eliminates so many of my anxieties about seeing a new therapist. He has such an easygoing style when he talks and he seems so understanding. He wishes me luck with my job interview, but he’ll get an update next week. With everything going on and to partly get me more comfortable with him, and maybe at my request, he’s seeing me on a weekly basis for a while.
Now, if I can only tackle my job interview in an hour.
When I get home, I’m happy to walk into my apartment and see Idaline. Her mood is kind of off, though. Her smile is half-hearted as she sits on the floor, playing with Sawyer.
“Where’s my dad?” I ask as I sit on the floor with them.
“I told him he could head on home.”
My eyes widen with surprise. She chose to spend time with Sawyer alone. She felt confident enough to do so. Then I ask, “Is everything okay?”
She shrugs while Sawyer crawls into my lap. He’s always happy to see me. “How was your day?” she asks.
“Good. How was yours? Do you think you’ll like your new therapist? How did the job interview go?” I’m worried about both considering she doesn’t seem that happy.
“Good,” she answers quietly. She focuses on Sawyer’s fish. “I think I’ll like my new therapist and the interview went well. I should hear something by the end of the week.”
“What’s bothering you then?”
Idaline looks up at me with apprehension. “Lila confronted me again today. She left when I threatened to call the cops. I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?” There’s nothing that she could possibly have to apologize for. With Sawyer now out of my lap, I crawl over to her and wrap an arm around her shoulders.
