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We had intended to wait a bit more, truth be told, but it just happened, and I don’t regret it. I just know it will be extra stress on Matt’s shoulders. More mouths to feed.
He told me that he couldn’t be happier, though. And I believe him. I can see the joy in his eyes. That man-pride, and the hope for the future. You can’t fake that. Can’t lie about it.
Right?
“What’s wrong, girl? I can feel you shaking, you know.” His hand smooths up my back, strokes my hair. “I’ve just spilled my fears for you. You said you wanna share everything. So tell me what’s on your mind.”
“I don’t want to be another burden,” I blurt out. “I want to find a job, any job, until the baby is born.”
“Christ, that’s what’s worrying you? You don’t have to, Tay. Just because I get so paranoid about things sometimes has nothing to do with you. I love taking care of you, of our baby, too. I know you want to get your bachelor’s, but we have time for that. Meanwhile, you can help out at the garage, if you want, keep the books. You’re good with numbers and stuff.” He smiles, I hear it in his voice. “That way I can look up and see you whenever I feel like the world is caving in on me, remember how lucky I am, and forget to be a grumpy old bastard.”
The tears threaten again, even as I smile through them at the image of a grease-covered, grumpy Matt looking up at me from where he’s working on a car, half-naked and sexy as a God to shoot me a grin and a wink. “Are you… are you happy with me? Being with me, having this baby? I’m…”
So insecure lately. Caught between the changes in my body, in my thoughts, the hormones wreaking havoc with my brain, and the upheavals in my life—the pregnancy, the end of college—they all seem too much right now.
All I want to do is nest in warmth and quiet, in a safe place, with Matt.
Nesting. That again.
God.
“Are you serious?” He’s pulling away again, and I don’t want him to, I want to stay in the circle of his arms, but he’s having none of it. He puts a finger under my chin, tilting my face up. “Tay. Hell, girl. You, the baby… Evan is right. You’re a blessing. You have my fucking heart. It’s yours.”
And why does this, his words, the sincerity ringing clear and true through them, make me cry harder? Dammit. “But I’ve changed. My body, my… my…”
God, I don’t even know what I’m trying to say, or do.
But he seems to know what I mean, what I need. “You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, and that’s not changing, Tay. Ever. If anything, I want you more every fucking day. Feel me?” He rocks his hips forward a little, and I gasp when his thick hard-on brands my stomach. “Feel how much I want you.”
My breath comes out in a rush, a maddening throb starting low in my belly, a wave of desire rolling through my body, tightening my nipples and heating my blood.
“God, I want you so damn much.” When he dips his head to brush his mouth over mine, licking the salt of tears off my lips, I wrap my arms around his neck and lose myself in him. Against my mouth, he whispers, “Let me show you.”
* * *
He walks me backward, until I hit the bed, and lowers me down, laying me out, moving to settle between my legs.
“I fucking love your dresses,” he grunts. “Love taking them off, or just…” He shoves the hem up my legs. I squirm on the bed as he drags down my panties, leaving me exposed. “Just lifting them up. Hot damn, girl... You’re so wet for me.”
I am. Cool air washes between my legs, over my overheated flesh, making me moan. And then he rubs his thumb over my clit, sliding it between my folds, a
nd I’m already panting, teetering on the edge of an orgasm that could tear me apart.
So of course I try to close my legs, escape from the intensity of the sensations, and of course he’s having none of it. He keeps my legs apart by wedging himself more firmly between them and flicks his thumb over my clit, making me gasp.
“Mine,” he says, his gaze lifting from my pussy to my face, eyes darkening to stormy black. “I’ll make you come.”
I have no doubt about that. “Inside me,” I breathe. “Want you inside me.”
Deep, filling me up, meshing with me.
“You ready for me?” Holding my gaze, he presses his thumb inside me, and I arch up, choking on a moan. “Fuck, I think you are.”
He’s still fucking me with his thumb, and I’m gasping, pleasure ricocheting inside my body, my release hovering just a breath away, right out of grasp, and—
He pulls his thumb out.
Leaving me poised on the edge, breathless and flushed, the pulse deep inside me painful.
