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Simon blinked, unsure if he’d heard correctly. “Say what now?”
“We’re going for another.”
“Going for another? Like you buy it at the supermarket?”
“No, like it takes time sometimes.” Nick scuffed his sneaker over the pavement. “It can be a process.”
Simon snorted. “The process of you fuck and oh shit.”
“You act like it’s so easy. Sometimes it isn’t. And how would you know anyway?”
Something twisted in Simon’s gut and he laced his sore hands behind his neck. Kids had never been part of his life plan. A wise person knew when they were too fucked up to bring anyone else into an already messed up world. He was okay with that decision. Had never questioned it.
But this whole Ian situation had screwed with his head. He didn’t know what he was about anymore. Everything that had seemed so brutally clear just yesterday was murky and dark.
“It was easy enough for you and Li the first time. Unplanned, wasn’t it? Just like Ian had to be.”
“You don’t know that.”
“What?”
“That Ian was unplanned. If he really is your brother. You just don’t know.”
Simon barked out a laugh. “She supposedly split to England while she was pregnant with him. Doesn’t seem like she was feeling the whole family vibe.”
“You don’t know,” Nick repeated. “Until we find out more, it’s all just speculation. And even after we do know, how do you ever know for sure what’s in someone else’s head? Even if they tell you.”
“There’s a cheery thought.” But so fucking true.
“As for it being easy enough the first time,” Nicky’s voice was unusually tight, “it doesn’t always work the same way twice. You get lucky. Hit by lightning.”
“Not sure those two things mean the same thing.”
Nicky jerked a shoulder. “No. But not everything happens on a timetable. Just like with the band. We had to work for it.”
“So what you’re saying is, in the old days, we had to hope and pray we didn’t knock up some chick. Now you’re hoping for the opposite.”
“Pretty much.”
His best friend’s smile was a relief. He didn’t know what to say when it came to this shit. He wasn’t the fatherly type, though he would’ve said the same about Nicky once upon a time.
No bad timing.
No good timing.
Just timing, and it was your choice to make the most of it.
Look at that, lyrics to a new song. His life felt like it was in the crapper right now, but at least he could channel his frustration into words and music.
Always his savior.
“We’re in no rush,” Nicky said after a minute. “Not like the practice is a hardship.”
“True that.” Simon dropped his arms into his lap. “Look, man, if what I said seemed insensitive…” He trailed off and sighed. “It was. Because I’m a dick. And in a mood. And you can take a free punch, but maybe wait until after the show, huh?”
Nicky laughed and stood up. “It’s no fun if you let me.” He held out his fist and bumped his knuckles with Simon. “C’mon, before your wife comes down here and de-balls you.”
“Probably deserve it.” Simon dragged himself to his feet. “I’m easy pickings right now. Christ, that kid has a fist on him.”
