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“I know that now.”
“Ian, look at me.”
I looked, though it hurt. Because this conversation was the closest I’d ever gotten to something real and tangible with my brother, and I wasn’t ready. Maybe I never would be. Especially when that connection came in the guise of a woman with kind eyes.
“You don’t hate me,” I whispered, my voice breaking.
She shook her head. “No. I don’t hate you.”
“But you should. Don’t you know what I did? Maybe they didn’t tell you.” I whisked my thumbs under my eyes. If I caught the tears before they fell, they didn’t count. I wasn’t shaming myself again with all I couldn’t hold inside.
Be a man, Ian. Is that so impossible for you? You’re not a child anymore.
“You’re right, I don’t know everything yet. I’m sure Simon is holding back what he thinks I can’t handle right now. But I know enough. I know things even he doesn’t. I saw that woman, Ian. She touched me and she scared the living fucking hell out of me. You endured that all alone for so many years, didn’t you?”
I shut my eyes. “She’s my mum.”
“She’s your mother, but you aren’t what she told you that you were. She’s obsessed with Simon.” Even with my eyes closed, I felt her tremor shift the bed. “In a very unhealthy way.”
“Yes. She always has been. He’s far better than me—”
“Ian.”
I opened my eyes and nearly broke from the compassion in hers.
“She doesn’t know the real Simon any more than she knows you. He’s a piece of fiction for her. I know you can’t get that because you spent every day with her, but I saw it for myself.”
“She had to leave him and then she had to raise me. I was always the thorn in her side. The other son. The one she would’ve swapped for him in a heartbeat.” I bowed my head. “At the end, she didn’t want me even as a trading piece.”
“It’s not reality. You’re not seeing that. The Simon she’s created—that’s not the real man.” Margo exhaled. “I love my husband. Love him more than I have words to say. But she’s not seeing the Simon who exists. The very flawed man who I love for his faults as much as his strengths.”
I swallowed hard and leaned forward, gripping the rail on the side of the bed. “He’s right to be angry at me. To wish me dead. If you’d seen him when you were gone... He was broken. Lost without you and your wee one.” I looked at her stomach, covered in a soft white blanket. “The baby is okay?”
She nodded and for the first time, her composure wavered. “Tough Reece and Kagan genes.”
“I’m so glad. I was so worried for you and the baby. I never knew. I swear, I didn’t. I would never have allowed it to go as far as it did if I had.”
“Simon hasn’t told me much, but I gathered that you’re the one who stopped it.”
“Far too late.”
“You didn’t know what they had in mind, but you tried to end your involvement.”
“Yes. It just wasn’t enough. She threatened Zoe. I never guessed she’d go for you. I thought Simon and you were safe. But she would hurt Zoe just to get back at me.”
“She didn’t hurt me. Well, beyond the initial crash. And her goons tossing me around and having me shackled and creeping me the fuck out more than once.” Margo picked at her blanket. “Guess you aren’t the only one who’s in denial, huh?”
I reached for her hand. “I’m so sorry. I wanted to take your place. I would have in an instant. You didn’t deserve—”
“Get your hands off her. Now.” My brother’s voice was like ice.
If ice had a form and was sharp enough to kill.
I let her go and sat back. The cocky smile came to my face automatically though the tears still hovered too close. “I had longer than I expected.”
“Simon, don’t. Don’t make a scene. It’s not what you think.”
Simon came around the bed to Margo’s other side, and he reached for her hand. “You have until the count of three before I call security in here and get your punk ass thrown out of this hospital. I was being charitable even letting you stay. And the minute I turn my back, you do this?”
