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“Sure.” He cracked his neck and grimaced. “Christ, getting too old to get wasted like that.”
“Yes, you are. You both are. Table dancing.” Sabrina shook her head at me. “Really, Ian.”
“How do you know about that?”
She held up her phone and something inside me shriveled.
All those flashbulbs.
I knew better. Really, I did. But sometimes I forgot and still believed I had my anonymity if people weren’t in my face. Some of them were just sneakier about it.
If Sabrina had seen, she probably wasn’t the only one. Maybe Simon had too.
And Zoe.
They probably thought I was living it up, when nothing could be further from the truth.
Swallowing hard, I went out to the back deck to find Flynn.
When I spotted him leaning against the rail, I gripped the jamb of the French doors. “I’m sorry. I know this is disrespecting your place. I didn’t know she was coming, I swear.”
He waved it off. “There’s plenty of room. Not sure why she got under my skin.”
“That superstar stuff is enough to make anyone to go a little mad. When she first flashed it at me, I thought it was the most exciting thing in the world. Then I realized what I’d have to trade to have all of that.” I let go of the jamb and pushed open the sliding door. “I understand why you don’t want to live in a fishbowl. Your need to do your own thing in your own way. Maybe I didn’t get it so much the first time we met, but I do now.”
“You’ve had a crash course in fame. Most don’t rise as fast as you.” He chuckled. “Some never do.”
I didn’t know if I was imagining the undercurrent of bitterness in his tone. “You know you’re wanted at Ripper, but I know why you don’t want to go that route.”
He gripped the wraparound railing and stared off across his property, his gaze fixed on the lake in the distance. “Might not matter, since I did that song with you.”
“You made that song so much better. Added a richness and a grit and life experience I don’t have yet.” I rubbed my throat. “Honestly, it’s an honor sharing a credit with you. But if you don’t want to be involved, I’ll re-record it alone. You don’t have to worry about that.”
“No. The song’s good. Whatever happens is meant. But you gotta understand something. I don’t do that shit. I don’t do duets, especially with dudes.”
I had to laugh. “Yeah, I get that. Thank you.”
“You’re going to go far, and it’ll turn out to be a case of I knew you when. I want to get in on the ground floor.” He grinned. “Now let’s be real. Are you going after your woman or not?”
It was my turn to stare into the distance. “I wasn’t going to push. She needs space.”
“And you gave it to her, right? It’s been a while.”
So long. Every minute, it felt like more of my chest was breaking apart without her. “It’s been a little while. Not sure if it’s been long enough for her.”
“So, go find out. Talk to her. Tell her you’ve seen the fucking light.”
My lips twitched. “Have I?”
“I can’t answer that, because I don’t fully know what your deal was with her. But I know you’ve sure as fuck been
searching for something. And my money’s on you that you’ll find it.”
“I miss her. I keep telling myself that she’s better off without me.”
“You love her, right?”
My eyes ached as I nodded. “So much.”
