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But she’d thought they were doing okay. Better than.
Maybe she’d been wrong.
Somehow she managed to hold her ground until the set ended. The next band came on, and she barely even made it through half of the first song before she murmured apologies to Denver and Tristan and pushed her way through the crowd. She had to get back to West.
She stumbled down hallways clogged with people, upstairs and down corridors, flashing her pass as she went. She’d felt so special wearing it around her neck. Now she wanted to tear it off.
The anger brewing inside her felt foreign. Of course she was worried about him too. That was the most potent emotion of all, going way down deep. She was scared for him in her bones, even though she didn’t quite no why. But so much of this thing between them had required operating on instinct and emotion, and this was no different.
She was pissed at him, and she couldn’t even delineate all the reasons. Sure, he’d kind of hijacked a charity concert, but he’d more than made up for it by donating his hair.
His beautiful hair.
She wasn’t mad at him for that. That was a kind gesture, and his own to make to boot. But she was angry he hadn’t confided in her if something was bothering him before he took that emotion with him into his concert.
Angry at herself for feeling like not enough, again. She was just starting to bury that emotion. To focus on her positive qualities rather than what she lacked.
Now she was questioning herself again, wondering if maybe West hadn’t told her what was going on because she was part of the problem. Maybe she’d been seeing things the way she wanted to. Just because a guy liked the sex didn’t mean he wanted to be with her long-term. That was just reality.
So much for not becoming that cliché of falling in love with the first guy she slept with.
Good one, Lo.
She turned the corner and saw West retreating down the hall into what she assumed was a green room.
“West,” she called out.
He stopped as if there was no one else around in spite of the people streaming in all directions. He dropped his backpack and turned, not facing her. Facing the wall.
She rushed up to him and instead of demanding answers as she’d intended, she followed instinct one more time. She wrapped her arms around him, cupping his newly shorn head in her hand. The prickle against her palm felt so much different than his flowing locks. But otherwise, he was the same. So much the same that her heart stampeded in her chest and she cleaved to him, desperate for the feel of his sweat on her skin. He was soaked and she should be too.
His mouth found hers, his tongue driving deep. “Need you,” he whispered, and she couldn’t nod fast enough.
She didn’t care how or why. All she cared about was that he was inside her again, filling her up. Chasing away the fear and the demons that were riding him. Riding her too as surely as if they were her own.
Because if he was hurting, she was too. It didn’t matter why. His pain was hers.
He hitched her up onto his hips, and she wound her legs and arms around him, holding on as he carried her into an alcove. People were right on the other side of the wall. She could see them out of the corner of her eye, for pity’s sake. If she leaned forward, they would be able to take a good long look. But West was shielding her, crowding her body into the wall, his broad shoulders hiding most of what was happening as he jerked down his zipper with one hand and streaked his mouth down her throat, licking and biting. Leaving marks again for everyone to see.
She should be embarrassed. She wasn’t. Not because she was checking off another box on her bucket list—semi-public sex achieved.
This wasn’t about that. This was about being whatever he needed right now, because she needed too. Just as much. She wanted to be his port in the storm, in whatever form that took.
He jockeyed her against the wall, mumbling apologies she didn’t need. She cupped his head, rocking against him, urging him on. He dragged down her shirt, revealing the top of her breast, and he latched his mouth onto her flesh, sucking hard. She cried out and banged her head, seeing stars for a whole new reason other than the usual. But he was already on the move, tugging down the cup of her bra too, exposing her full breast and already tight nipple. He slipped it between his teeth, grazing the tip, and she arched, already desperate for more friction between her legs.
Reaching down, she unzipped her jeans. God, she needed to start wearing skirts and dresses. Easier access. He muttered something similar and released her breast long enough to yank her jeans and panties over her ass. The slap of cooler air against her bare skin made her squirm. She bumped her ass against the wall, shocked anew she was doing this.
Then he was there, shifting her, spreading her thighs open with his hard cock. She hadn’t even been fully aware of him pulling it out. All she knew was that the flared head was rubbing against her clit, already so swollen and needy, and she couldn’t catch her breath. He felt so good bare. That hot skin warming her where she’d gone cold. She grinned against him, tightening her legs around his hips, clinging for all she was worth. Meeting his hungry lips with her own so that when he pierced her, that thick flesh spreading her wide, she moaned against his tongue. He answered her with a moan of his own, surging deeper.
So good. Raw. She tossed her head back and forth, fighting to continue the kiss when her system was rioting and she was so close already. His eyes popped wide, but she didn’t care. She rocked her hips, taking more of him with a groan. God, nothing had ever felt better than the two of them skin on skin.
She crushed her breasts to his chest and gripped his head, the sharp pricks from his short hair somehow adding more sensation. Bouncing on his cock as he pulled out and shoved himself home again wasn’t just natural, it was an imperative. She couldn’t get enough. Her clit was so stiff, and she knew she had to be dren
ching him. His teeth sank into her lip and her eyes opened, latching onto his as her climax loomed.
No staving it off. No waiting.
“Now, now, now,” she chanted, begging him. Even if he didn’t want her to beg, she had to. He had to know how he affected her. That he was everything she’d ever wanted and more than she could have imagined.
