AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Harley’s not a crier. She can show emotions without tears. Knowing she’s torn up over me is a mark on my soul.
“I may have left you, but you were always in my line of sight. The academy was a necessity to forge the path of my future. Get a job, start a career, be solid so I could offer stability. And fuck me for saying this, but plans for the polished husband and perfect life were never in your cards. Because even if you were involved with someone, I was coming for you.”
“I’m thinking an accountant with sensibility and logic sounds good right about now.”
I smile into her hair at her remark, because there was no way that was happening.
“There’s more, gorgeous, because in order to get what I wanted, I made a deal for the Reserves. I also made a new plan. We left just shy of ten years because of the academy training schedule. We are obligated to the Reserves for two more years. It’s a special arrangement, unconventional, and I’m not at liberty to discuss, but it works for the four of us.”
“What exactly does that mean?” she utters into my neck.
“A lot of boring bullshit, but we are a team. One weekend a month, two to three weeks a summer, the usual routine. We will most likely never see a desert or special ops again.”
“Most likely?”
I cup the back of her head and massage the base of her neck. “That’s the least of my worries at this point.”
“It should be because I may hold a grudge for the next ten years.”
She’s full of shit.
“And tomorrow, I’m scouting the local CPA firms for a solid-looking bean counter.”
Full of shit again.
“Not a good idea to tell me about your tactics. Gives me more of a reason to monitor you.”
She bolts up, giving me the briefest glimpse of her face before trying to scramble away. I catch her under the armpits, throwing us sideways and pinning her to the sofa with my body. She twists inward, hiding her face in my neck, her hands trapped between us.
“Do you understand now, Harley?”
She hiccups, and the tears stain my skin again. “I don’t want to. I want to be furious with you, make you leave and never talk to you again.”
“But you’re not.” What I don’t say is that she can try to make me leave, but I’m not going anywhere.
“Don’t sound so self-righteous. ”
“Leaving here and having you not speak to me isn’t an option.”
She remains quiet for a while. I wonder if she’s fallen asleep until her hand flattens over my heart.
“I’m confused,” she admits softly.
“Tell me why and I can help.”
“I’ve spent so long feeling rejected, accepting that you didn’t see me as more than a friend. It had to be enough to have you in my life. When you walked away three years ago and avoided me, it was like losing you all over again. Then there was Saturday… Sunday… Monday and now today. I’m on an emotional rollercoaster.”
“You have never been, nor will you ever be, just a friend to me. I’ve made a lot of mistakes, Harley. I left you, but my heart was always yours. Everything I’ve done is for you. For us.”
Her breath hitches again, and I brace for more tears. Instead, she sucks in a deep breath and drops her neck back, bringing us face to face. Every inch of her skin is splotchy from her forehead to her chin, and her eyes are glassy with unshed tears. It takes all I have to not collapse on top of her.
“Is this real now? Are we done playing around? I’m not sure I can deal with the uncertainties and whiplash again.”
“For me, this is as real as it gets.”
The tears clear from her eyes, and she studies me closely, bringing her hand to my jaw. “Is there anything else I need to know? Any more soul-racking confessions?”
“All my cards are on the table. If you need time, I’ll be patient.”
She looks to the ceiling and rolls her bottom lip between her teeth as she considers what I’ve said. Her eyes fall back to mine, shining bright. The sadness and hurt from earlier are gone. “I don’t need time.”
10
Harley
“Spill it, I’ve waited long enough.” Jewls rushes behind the bar, dropping her bag in the usual spot. “I can’t believe you didn’t call me at work today!”
“Keep your voice down.” I glance around to make sure the few customers we have are taken care of and tug her out of earshot. Quickly, I give her a run-down of my last two days. When I’m done, she’s staring at me in disbelief.
“Say something.” I wave my hand in front of her face. There are very few times Jewls is at a loss for words. She’s known for her quick wit and snark. I wasn’t sure how’d she react, but stunned silence wasn’t in my mind.
