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“I’m ready,” I told him. “Just saying goodbye to Georgia.”
Hunter smiled. “That’s why I’m here, too. Couldn’t leave without saying goodbye to one of my favourite cousins!”
“Then I’ll leave you to it.” I turned back to Georgia and said, “Look after yourself. And I’ll see you very soon.”
She smiled. “Bye, Jesse.”
Chapter Twenty – Drowning
Isabelle
I don’t know why, but I felt more nervous on our last night out than I did on our first. I should have been calmer, I certainly felt more comfortable with Jesse than before, but the nerves kept bubbling inside me, making me feel sick.
Of course, it was mostly because I knew Jesse had to leave the next day, and the idea of him not being in my house anymore made me want to curl up in a ball and cry. It sounded stupid even to me, but the thought of being without him made me ache in places I didn’t know existed.
Georgia had very kindly offered to help get me ready, even though she couldn’t come with us. She remembered how uncomfortable I was the last time she gave me a makeover, and this time, she kept everything understated. She let me borrow one of her favourite dresses. An ankle length, baby pink dress with thin straps and sparkles across the bust. My make-up was kept very simple, but she did my hair the same way she had before, with soft wispy curls hanging by my face. Maybe it seemed over the top, but we’d chosen to eat at one of the classiest restaurants in Notting Hill, and we wanted to make sure we looked our best.
When Willow arrived in my room, my jaw dropped to the floor. It wasn’t that she didn’t always look great, but she usually put comfort ahead of anything else. She’d made a huge effort for our double date, and I could barely believe she was the same girl who often wore gypsy skirts and Ugg boots. She opted for an ankle length gown too, but hers was midnight blue. While mine had a straight, close fitting skirt, Willow’s flowed around her feet and there was a jewelled band around her waist. Her hair, full of wild curls on a normal day, had been straightened to perfection.
“Oh my God,” I breathed. “You look … you’re so beautiful!”
Willow’s face broke into a grin. “I clean up pretty good, don’t I?”
I hugged her tightly, then gently eased her back so I could stare at her again.
“Has Hunter seen you yet?” I asked.
“Not yet. Your mum answered the door.”
“He is going to die when he sees you, Willow. Seriously.”
She laughed. “I better go home and change then, I need him alive tonight!”
“I cannot wait to see the look on his face.”
“Me neither,” she giggled, but then her face turned more serious. “How are you doing?”
“I’m … coping,” I told her. “But I really can’t talk about how I feel, I’ll ruin my makeup.”
“I understand. You look amazing too, by the way.”
“Thank you.”
I turned to look in the full length mirror in the corner of my room, and sighed. I knew I looked good, and I wanted to stay that way. If I started crying, I would ruin all of Georgia’s hard work, so I tried to focus only on the evening ahead, and not what would happen the next day.
Or when we got home.
Jesse and I briefly touched on the subject of sex, and the only conclusion we reached was that neither of us were against it. It was more a matter of timing than anything. In my heart of hearts, I didn’t know if I was really ready for it. I had only known him for two weeks, and losing my virginity wasn’t something I planned to just throw away. Not that it would be that way with Jesse. But I didn’t hold on to it for seventeen years just to lose it because a good-looking guy happened to notice me for once.
He isn’t that guy. And you know it.
I really knew it. My feelings for him were so intense, I thought I might drown in them, but even though that was true, I still didn’t want to rush anything.
“You’re thinking about sex, aren’t you?” Willow asked.
My eyes widened. “How did you know that?”
She doubled over, laughing, “I didn’t know for sure, but you looked sort of … spacey. Have you had sex with Jesse?”
