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“Come here, sweetheart,” Mom said gently.
I nudged him. “She’s talking to you.”
He blinked, surprised, and I hated how long he’d gone without knowing the love of a mother that he couldn’t recognize it when he heard it.
She’ll love him too. Always.
Holden approached my mother and she took his hand that had been in mine.
“Thank you,” she said.
“I haven’t done anything…” His voice was thick.
“You make my son happy. That’s a gift. The greatest gift I’ll ever receive.”
Holden shook his head, shoulders trembling.
“Oh, honey.”
Mom extended her thin arms to him, and to my shock, Holden bent and put his around her. She held him, and I saw her eyes close against his shoulder.
After a few moments, he stood up stiffly. “My apologies. I usually have more personality than this.” He wiped his eyes and smoothed his coat. “It was extraordinary to meet you, Nancy, but if you’ll excuse me…”
He strode out, shooting me a tear-filled look as he passed.
“He’s beautiful,” Mom said.
“He’s a handful,” I said. “But I love him. I wish I’d told you sooner.”
“You told me. That’s all that matters.” She held her arms to me and I hugged her carefully, inhaling her, begging my cells to remember what this felt like. “I love you, River.”
“Love you, Mom.” Tears choked my throat and burned my eyes.
She took me by the shoulders, mindful of my injury. “Go. He’s waiting for you.”
“He might not stay. I’m losing both of you.”
“You aren’t losing me, honey. Please don’t forget that.” Then she smiled, so beautiful in her happiness. “And he’s not gone yet. There’s always hope.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
I paced the hallway outside the Whitmore’s bedroom until River came out, shutting the door quietly behind him.
I whirled on him. “Why did you do that?”
“You know why.”
I stared, the Alaskan cold chewing up and spitting out the warmth I’d had from being in Nancy Whitmore’s presence for only a few minutes.
“Jesus, River, you bring me into that room? With your mom? It’s…”
“Sacred?” he shot back. “Yeah, it is. That’s the point. I shared some of her last moments with you because I love you, you moron. Don’t you get it?”
I love you, too. I love you so much…
I wanted to scream it so loud that the whispering voices were drowned in it. But they were louder and their breath so damn cold.
You can’t have him. You’ll ruin him like you do everything else. You almost did already…
