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ALEX

Nine Years Ago

“Alex, you’re finally home.”

Samantha appeared out of the living room, standing inside the hallway with her arms crossed over her chest. I looked at my watch, only noticing now it was after seven. I’m not surprised she’s angry since I told her I’d be home for dinner.

This had become a regular occurrence lately, and I knew I had to start being more careful. Soon, I kept telling myself, soon.

“Sorry, I got caught up at the hospital with Dad,” I lied.

“Well, you’re here now, I guess. I have some news to tell you.” Her face brightened as she bounced around me. “Come, sit down.”

I followed her to the living room. She patted the couch where I reluctantly took a seat next to her, exhausted from the double life I was living. Samantha continued to smile, something I hadn’t seen in a while. She’s a beautiful woman. Her long golden blonde hair flowed down her back, her azul eyes sparkling as she spoke. I remembered a time when I couldn’t get enough of her. But that was before…

“Alex, I’m pregnant.”

She was what?

Each word was like dynamite exploding one after another. Jerking my head back, my brain couldn’t comprehend, and I blurted out the first words that came to mind. “How did this happen? I haven’t fucked you in three months!”

I began to tremble with rage, my angered gaze slicing through her as I distanced myself from where she sat. Every scenario ran through my mind, but all I could come up with was nothing. I had no recollection of touching her, let alone sticking my dick inside of her long enough to get her pregnant.

Her demeanor changed with the cut of my words. The beautiful smile disappeared, her face turned red, the veins on her forehead were ready to burst at any given moment. She folded her arms, her chest rising and falling at a fast pace. I braced myself knowing the storm was about to hit, and I was standing in its path.

“That’s nice, Alex. You can’t even remember fucking your wife,” she shot back. Animosity lingered in her words, and unable to look at her, I paced the area near the couch. “It was that night you came home drunk a month ago. I remember it because you couldn’t get enough of me, fucking me for hours telling me how much you loved me.” Lost in thought, she paused, the smirk of satisfaction subsiding as if she realized the enormity of this situation.

I remembered the night. It was the night Charlotte and I were doing tequila shots behind the bleachers at school. She had dared me to take shots from her belly, but I thought it was more interesting for her to hold the shot glass between her thighs. We fucked twice on the cold, dirty ground, and all I can remember was dragging myself home completely inebriated and passing out in our bed.

How could you let this happen?

The temperature was rising in the room. Suddenly, my chest tightened, unable to swallow, unable to breathe, my hands shaking uncontrollably.

I knew the signs.

I was having a panic attack.

“You took advantage of me?” I yelled as my panic morphed into anger.

Her stare was cold and uninviting. She was no longer the sweet girl I married in college, but I knew that was my fault, I brought this out of her. I felt a pang of guilt. I screwed this up big time. Fuck, what will my mom and dad say? What the hell will Adriana say? It occurred to me at this moment that I actually didn’t give a shit what they thought. It was Charlotte plaguing me, and the hurt this would cause.

I eyed the vase sitting on the table, and with a lapse in judgment, I whacked the fucking ugly piece of shit, watching it smash against the wall into a million pieces, the flowers and water scattering all across the room.

Samantha jumped in shock followed by a small whimper. “Took advantage of you?” she cried, throwing her arms in the air. “You are my husband, not hers!”

I froze.

Not even a flinch.

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sp; I knew she had suspected something. I just didn’t know how much she knew. My tongue was tied, there were no words I could say right now that could erase this moment.

This was it—she knew.

No turning back.

No denying the truth.

The moment I had dreaded since the day I fell in love with Charlotte had come, but this wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. There wasn’t supposed to be a baby involved. The room remained silent. I buried my head in my hands unable to cope with the magnitude of the situation.

“Samantha…” I didn’t know how to respond, unable to rid myself of the dullness in my chest, the heaviness of my actions crippling my ability to think straight.

What would Charlotte think when she found out? I promised her I hadn’t touched Samantha since we began our affair. My stomach churned—I couldn’t lose her. No way could I lose Charlotte. I wouldn’t know how to live without her. The pain in my chest deepened as the possibility weighed heavily on my mind that Charlotte would walk out of my life for good.

“Anyway, I’m sure your little girlfriend will find out soon. Kaley Wilson was at the doctor’s office when I found out. We had a nice little chat,” she gloated.

Kaley Wilson, the little bitch, had made life hell for Charlotte. She was probably knocking on Charlotte’s door right now spreading the news. I needed to get out, I needed a chance to explain all this to Charlotte. She needed to know how sorry I was, but more importantly, that I didn’t mean to hurt her. My poor Charlotte, my heart sank knowing what was coming. The urge to protect her from the pain was the only thing I was determined to do.

The doorbell rang much to my surprise as we weren’t expecting anyone. Samantha walked over to open the door, and I heard the voices, recognizing them immediately. It was my parents and sister. I prepared myself for what was about to come.

“Hi, son. Samantha called us over saying you had some news.”

My mother leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. Her face excited, I knew she had suspected something, her life-long dream of being a grandmother finally being fulfilled. I couldn’t keep up the charade, the anger I felt right now was overwhelming.

“Please, Andrew and Emily, sit down.” Samantha led them to the living room, my sister grabbing Samantha’s hand, jumping up and down.

“Would anyone like a drink?” Samantha asked.

“We’re fine, sweetheart. Please, what’s the big news?”

“Well, I might as well get straight to the point. Alex and I are expecting a baby!” she squealed.

Adriana started jumping up and down, hugging Samantha, careful not to squeeze her. My mother, already crying, also stood to hug Samantha.

My father remained still, pressing his lips tightly, not saying a single word. Unlike the women around me elated over the news, he didn’t express any emotion besides an expression of disappointment.

“A bit young, don’t you think?” he questioned with a bitter smile.

Yes, Dad. Fucking young and a massive fail on my behalf, I wanted to yell at him.

“Andrew, please,” my mother scolded. “A child is a blessing.”

“Emily, he has a career to focus on with years of studying to become a doctor, and now what?”

Despite my anger toward this outcome, I didn’t appreciate being spoken about like I wasn’t standing here. But what could I say? I didn’t want this baby. I wasn’t ready to become a father.

“You’re right, Dad,” I agreed, biting my tongue to stop the malice teetering on the edge. “It all seems like a waste, but you did it with Mom, same age. So, what’s stopping me?”

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