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“I can come in, if you want? Give you a hand?”
“No, no,” I shoot back a little panicked. “I’m fine I won’t be a moment.”
Really what I’m doing it waiting the allotted time for the lines to come up on the pregnancy test that I’m taking. The one minute for a plus or minus sign. And yes, I know that waiting for my wedding morning while I’m already in my dress isn’t the best idea, but I’ve been so busy with the business and I guess I’ve also been putting it off a bit, so here I am doing the most stupid thing possible. I could have waited until afterwards, but I didn’t want to actually get hitched without knowing. I need that answer and I need it now.
Fucking hell, come on then, I demand silently to the stick. I need to know right now.
But this minute feels like it’s taking forever. It’s killing me as I stare at it and nothing comes up. My foot shakes on the ground, my knee aches, my fingers are twitching with nerves. I don’t know why I’m so freaked out about this, I wouldn’t mind what the answer is either way, it’s just the anticipation killing me.
“Oh my God,” I gasp as the sight before me. “Oh my God, oh my God.”
“Raelyn!” Bang, bang! Abbi hammers on the door again. “What the hell is going on? Please tell me that you aren’t having second thoughts about this wedding. Because it is looking amazing in there.”
“No, no.” I unlock the bathroom door and push it open. “I just found something out.”
“Something? What do you mean something?” I hold up the stick. “You’re pregnant?”
“I am pregnant, yes. How crazy is that? I’m about to have a baby.”
“Why didn’t you tell me that you were doing a test? How did you do that alone?”
“I just… I wasn’t sure what the outcome would be and I freaked out.” Tears roll down my cheeks. But they are happy ones. I wasn’t sure what I wanted the result to be, but now I’m sure that this was what I was desperately hoping for. I so want a baby for Carter and me, conceived out of our love. “But now it’s positive.”
“Are you happy? I can’t tell if you’re happy or not?”
“I’m happy,” I insist. “I’m really, really happy.”
Abbi throws her arms around me, but then she runs away quickly. I assume that she’s going to get us water or something, so I use the time by myself to straighten out again. I still want to look my best when I get married, even if I have just had the craziest news ever. I stare at my reflection in the mirror and straighten my hair and try to smooth out my makeup. I don’t think I even need a touch up, which is a good thing.
“Raelyn.” Carter’s voice makes me jump. He’s in the women’s bathroom with me. “Are you okay?”
“Carter?” I spin around rapidly and try to cover myself up, but it’s too late. He’s seen my dress now. “You aren’t supposed to see me before we walk down the aisle! What are you trying to do? Give us bad luck?”
“I’m not worried about bad luck. I know that you and me are going to be just fine.”
I smile, I can’t help myself. He just has this incredible way of looking at things which really inspires me. “What are you doing here? I’m supposed to be just having a moment to myself before the big day.”
“Abbi just told me that you really need to speak to me. I assume it was an emergency.”
I don’t know how to say it so I lift up the stick to do the answering for me. He looks at me a little confused, but realization crosses his face when he gets it. “Is this what I think it is?”
“It is.” I gulp down the thick ball of emotion. “It’s a positive pregnancy test.”
“We’re having a baby!” He pumps his fists in the air in celebration. “I’m having a baby with the woman who looks like that… you are beautiful, I’m sorry I didn’t say it when I first walked in, I was just worried because I thought it was a massive emergency. I didn’t realize it was the best news in the world.”
Carter crosses the room, closing the gap between us, and he wraps his arms around me. His hug is the most wonderful thing in the world, it feels incredible. To just know that he’s in this with me, that he’s as happy as I am about the baby… well, it’s just incredible. I’m so happy.
“We better get out there in a moment,” Carter finally says. “Everyone is out there waiting for us to get married. We wouldn’t want to disappoint the crowd now, would we?”
“Crowd!” I scoff. “There aren’t that many people out there. Just the important ones.”
“I think you’re under estimating how many important ones there are! The hall is absolutely crammed with people. I am going to go and take my place now, and wait for you, if you’re ready.”
I stare at him in the eyes for a couple of moments, loving him with everything I have. “Okay, I’m ready.”
He leaves, letting go of my hand at the very last moment, and I have a couple more moments to calm myself down. I breathe deeply and smile at myself. This is a huge day for me, absolutely massive, I’m about to become a wife and I have just found out that I’m going to be a mother too. I really am progressing and becoming a better person. A real life adult. The girl that I was locked away in that room, trapped by the gang is long gone. Now, I have blossomed into the best version of myself possible. I love it.
Then Abbi comes to get me and the wedding starts. I stand at the back of the room, anxiously looking forward to walking towards my man. I know that it’s supposed to be bad luck, but I’m actually glad that we have already seen one another. Now there isn’t so much panic, now it’s just something that I’m excited about.
