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“Yes, of course.” I nod slowly. “Sounds great.”
As she leaves me alone, walking with the same swing of her hips that always gets me going, I sit back down at my desk with a deep sigh. I feel good, all deflated and satisfied now. I really could probably leave the office now that I have no meetings for the rest of the day but I can’t let go the control of this place. I’m sure the company won’t fall apart without me but I just hate to give any of it up for even a second. It’s something that I’ve worked so hard on, I can’t just let it go now.
“Right,” I mutter to myself as I glance around the room trying to work out what needs to be done. “Email, filing, check in with all the managers, see what’s going on in all the departments, and then… home.”
Home.
Home is still a good place for me, I have a lot of reasons to go back there, but there are also a lot of sad memories too. Things that I find it hard to be near, that I want to just forget. There are times when my heart still really hurts but I have to keep going. There are too many people that need me.
Chapter Two – Katy
“So, Miss Atwater, can you please explain this clause to me again? I don’t think I get it.”
I really resist the urge to roll my eyes as my client asks me to explain again. This corporate law stuff is so easy to me, it’s like reading a children’s book, so much so that it’s hard for me to remember that it isn’t as easy for everyone else. I have to bite my tongue all the damn time.
“Yes, of course, let me go through it again. Would you like me to get you another coffee first?
I rise from my chair, all ready to go and get one whatever his answer is. The break is for me, not him anyways. I need a moment to collect myself together and to keep my cool. It looks like it’s going to be another late night… mind you, every night is a late one here. Ever since I started being a lawyer I haven’t had much of a social life. Then again, I’m sure it’ll be better when I’m a partner. That’s the goal, that’s the moment when my life will get easier. When I’m made a partner.
The decision for the next partner is coming up soon as well and I know that I’m one of the candidates. I just need to get through the next few weeks and I can be one of the ones who delegate the work rather than take it on. I cannot wait, it’s going to be freaking incredible.
“Yes, please. A latte would be great. I’ll take a look through this again while I wait.”
It’s almost pointless for him to do so since he doesn’t understand any of it, but I don’t bother saying that. I give him a smile through gritted teet
h instead. “I’ll be right back.”
As I get to the luxurious coffee machine – the one good thing about working here – I see Grant standing with his head in his hands. My heart skips a beat as I see him, he’s one of those men who manages to be good looking even when he’s been working for twelve hours straight. His blond hair is disheveled, his blue eyes look strained, his skin is sallow and tired… but still I like him. It’s just a shame that the feelings will never be reciprocated. He has a girlfriend who’s so beautiful that it’s actually painful. She’s got long, gorgeous legs, amazing boobs, a great face… and she’s funny too. She’s the complete package types and I’m incredibly jealous of her. Maybe if Grant could see me at my best, out of work, he would see me in the same light but he never does.
“Long day?” I ask him with a bright, beaming smile. “Looks like you’re having fun.”
“I’ve just been at it for so long,” he whines pathetically. “I’m so freaking tired.”
I move to the coffee machine and make some drinks for me and my client. “Yeah tell me about it. Still, it’s the partner meeting soon, we all have to keep it up.”
Grant is probably the only one person I wouldn’t mind losing, but only because of the ridiculous crush I have on him. I’m so pitiful that I’d actually be happy to see him getting the reward which I so desperately need. I wouldn’t even mind working my ass off for a few extra months if he could be happy. Despite the fact that he has it all already. God, I need to get a grip!
“Yeah, that’s true.” Grant loosens his tie and shakes his head. “Still, I had plans tonight and I’ve had to cancel again. It gets on top of me a bit sometimes.”
“Oh shit!” I yank my phone out of my pocket as his words remind me of something. “Oh, my God, I have to make a phone call quickly. Just… could you please watch the drinks for me, will you?”
Grant gives me an odd look but he nods and agrees with me. I know that I’m acting strange but I need to make this call now before it gets any later. Robyn, my best friend since college, is already going to be mad at me for this, I don’t want to make it worse. I move into an empty hallway with my heart thumping in my throat. I can’t deny that I’m nervous to make this call. I promised faithfully that I wouldn’t let her down this time, but here I am about to do it again.
I bite down my nail and pace up and down while the phone rings, amping up my nerves more with each passing second. The anticipation is killing me. I can’t stand it.
“Don’t tell me,” Robyn answers with a weary sounding voice. “You can’t come.”
“I’m so sorry, I only just remembered I know that I promised, but it’s just that…”
“Work, I know. I always know. It’s always work.”
“It’ll get better, I promise you,” I insist maybe a little too frantically. “Once I’m made partner, it’ll be much better I won’t let you down again.”
“Katy, I know you keep telling me this, but you are always busy. From what I understand the partners at your office are always busy. There doesn’t seem to be anyone in your office that has any kind of social life. I really don’t think anything will change…”
“Please don’t be mad at me.”
I can’t lose Robyn, she’s the only one who’s stuck around in my crazy, busy life. When we left college, there were lots of us but most of them drifted off to their own ends of the country to do their own things, but very few remained all stuck together. Except now, they’ve stuck with Robyn but not me. I don’t blame them, I’m never free to do anything so there isn’t much point in inviting me, but still… I cannot lose Robyn.
