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“I was not going to say that, Mark. Hell, we all know she is crazy about you and would never cheat on you. I was just wondering if you think her family knew this whole time and didn’t say anything?” Shit. I didn’t even think about that. I stand there on the sidewalk staring at her and I cannot honestly answer that. On one hand, I would like to think if they knew they would have made her tell me. On the other hand, she is their daughter, and they would do anything to make her happy.
“Good question,” I say simply.
“So, did she tell you why she left?”
“No. I mean to be fair I didn’t really give her a chance either. I thought I was calm and in control, but fuck, feeling my daughter kick inside of her set something off in me.” She gasps and I realize what I said. I smile, watching my sister’s eyes light up.
“It’s a girl. You’re having a baby girl. Oh my God.” She throws her arms around me and hugs me. I hug her back and for the first time in the past hour, I allow myself to feel happy. When she pulls back she smirks. “Poor little girl. You are going to be worse than dad.” I chuckle because she is right. I already feel this protective instinct and she is not here yet.
We barely make it into the house before my parents are walking in the door. “Is it true? Am I going to be a grandma?” My mom asks me excitedly, practically skipping. I shake my head and smile. Small town life.
“Yeah mama. It’s true.”
“Well hell. That girl got up and left with a Bishop in her belly.” My father, the Mayor of our town, rightfully indignant, sits in his thinking chair. “You sure you didn’t know about it, son.” I feel affronted. Pissed he could even ask me that. He notices my demeanor change and clears his throat. “I’m sorry, son. I didn’t mean it. I know I raised you better than that. I guess I just can’t believe she would run, knowing she was carrying your baby. Unless…”
“Fuck. If one more person insinuates she cheated on me and that the little girl inside of her is not mine, I will destroy everything in my path. For the last damn time, she was never unfaithful to me. NEVER!! I don’t know why she left, but that baby is mine. MINE!” I yell before throwing everything off the coffee table. My body is heaving as the anger abates and when I look up, my mom is crying, hand to her mouth as my sister and dad look at me like I am someone else. “Crap,” I say, running my hand through my hair. “I am sorry, guys. I don’t know what got into me,” I say, picking up everything.
“It’s okay, my son. I would be angry too,” my dad reassures me. My mom is silent, and I feel like shit.
“Mama, I am sorry,” I say, hugging her. My mom is a gentle soul. It kills me to make her upset. When I pull back from her, she looks me in the eye.
“A girl.” I find myself laughing because that seems to be all everyone is focused on once they know it warms my heart.
“Yeah, mama. A girl.”
“So now what?” my sister asks.
“Lara, I wish I knew.” I wish I fucking knew.
Chapter Seven
TIFFANY
I have never felt more unsure of a decision than I do right now about my choice to leave. I left the house he took me to and sit in my car in front of my parents' house. I have no idea how long I sit in the car before I get out and walk into the house. I manage to hold it together long enough to make it into the house before I fall apart. I slump on the couch, body shaking with sobs and tears as I hold my belly, apologizing to my baby girl for making our life a mess. I am so entranced in the pain that I don’t hear my mom come into the room and don’t feel her sit beside me. When her arm wraps around me, I lean into her embrace and cry harder.
It feels like hours, but it is really minutes. “I take it the reunion didn’t go well.” My mom states the obvious wiping my tears.
“No,” is all I can say before more tears start.
“It can’t be that bad. That boy has loved you since y'all were teenagers. Surely that hasn’t changed.” I shake my head no because it is true. It hasn’t changed, but it might be too late. “Unless you no longer love him.” Her eyes show compassion, but also confusion. I don’t blame her. My actions as of late have been anything but those of a person in love.
