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I shake my head. “You’re trying to confuse me. You’re so good at manipulation I don’t know which end is up.”
“Tell me something.” He pauses to study me. “In our most intimate moments, tell me you didn’t feel the same spark of soul-connecting electricity as me. Tell me you felt the very same connection with Adam. I want to hear you say he made your heart race ten times more when he kissed you. I want you to tell me you wished he were your next breath to breathe at the mere sight of him. Tell me I’m lying about that, Jules.”
It’s a sight to watch this grown man soften his felonious eyes as he pleads with me. He’s twisting my heart all around, making an unsolvable puzzle in his wake. When I don’t answer, he leans in nose-to-nose, daring me to deny his claims as he hisses through clenched teeth, “Tell me, dammit! Tell me I’m wrong.”
I’m taken aback by the ferocity in his voice, and my stomach twists with angst. “I can’t do this. I just can’t. I can’t just jump in with both feet, Travis,” I hoarsely whisper as a lone teardrop leaks out of the corner of my eye. “I don’t know what awaits in your murky pool of lies, and I can’t see through the hordes of piranhas swimming around you, ready to eat me alive.” Another teardrop slips, and my eyes become blurry. “I had a life, you know,” I cry through clenched teeth. “I had a fiancé, and God knows what he’s going through right now. You just can’t erase my past like this, and then expect me to fall in line with a compliant smile on my face.”
I suck in a ragged breath, tears clogging my throat, both pain and frustration taking over my emotions. “You’re telling me my previous life as I once knew it is now over. You’re saying I have to stay with you, because you’re protecting me, but yet you won’t tell me why. You’re sugarcoating reality, and the actual reality is you’re holding me captive.” A pained cry leaves my lungs as I pound on his chest with my fists. “Everything is wrong with this picture, Travis! Everything.”
I slide my body to the side of his, trying to get away from him. I need some breathing room. He grabs my elbow to stop me, but I yank my arm out of his grasp and glare at him through watery eyes. “Don’t,” I hoarsely warn. The crushing weight of the combined stressors is too much to for me to handle. Anger and pain are thick inside my chest like the viscosity of saltwater taffy, causing me to gasp for air. “Just let me be.”
His eyes convey hurt, but I refuse to look at him anymore and have him affect me. I quickly slip off the bed and stop to grab a few clothes from the tipped over laundry basket. With my hands full, I make my way to the bathroom, and then lock the door behind me. I grab onto the sink’s countertop and close my eyes, stealing a deep, shaky breath. I notice my hands are trembling. I think I’m on the verge of a nervous breakdown. For all I know, maybe I’m having one now. A few more silent tears spill over my cheeks. My insides are torn to shreds.
Insanity hangs in the balance by a mere thread. The only thing keeping me from entering no man’s land is a tiny glimmer of hope. I have to keep the faith I will see my dad and Jake again, the only family and unconditional love I have left. I quickly slip on a t-shirt and panties. A firm knock sounds on the wooden door and it startles me. There is nothing he can do or say to ease my pain.
“Jules, open the door. You’re in distress, and I can’t have you shutting down on me,” he orders with a stern voice. “The things you’ve been through over the last forty-eight hours,” he pauses, and then softens his voice, “well…you really shouldn’t be alone and upset like this. I’m concerned, baby.”
Concerned? If he were concerned for me, he’d let me call home. Anger bubbles up from the pit of my stomach, and I’m glad for it. I’d rather pour my energy into anger than spend the time in a mess of self-pity, so I snap.
My lungs explode with vehement sarcasm, “What’s the matter, Travis? Did you run out of Blyss, or do you have a dose waiting for me if I open the door?”
A loud boom crashes into the wall on the other side of the door, and I jump back. Startled, my heart leaps into my throat. By the sound of it, Travis has punched a hole in the wall. I know what I said was a low blow, but I don’t care; he asked for it.
