AllFreeNovel
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“Who will take care of all of you? Do the cooking?”
Mom smiles. “I will. I can handle it for a week. Take all the time you need.”
“Who are you, and what have you done with my mother?” I can’t help saying.
Dad, Mom, and Darla all erupt in laughter.
“Damn, that hurts,” Dad says.
An hour and a half later, I’m in the office. Callie, Troy, and Alyssa are all at their stations, and I’m getting ready to go down to court by nine o’clock. I have another two speeding tickets to prosecute, and I peruse the files. I haven’t told my staff that I’m now the actual city attorney. Not yet. I’m giving Mom a chance to change her mind.
“Donny?” Alyssa’s voice comes through the intercom.
“Yeah?”
“I have a Pat Lamone on line one for you.”
My eyebrows pop up on their own. What the hell does he want? “Sure. Put him through.”
“You got it.”
“This is Donny Steel.”
“Hey, Donny. It’s Pat Lamone.”
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” My tone is slightly sardonic. Make that really sardonic.
“I want to file a complaint.”
“Then you should be talking to the sheriff. Not to me.”
“Oh?”
“Yes. If you have a criminal complaint, you go to the police. If they decide it should be prosecuted, then they come to me.”
“Oh. I’m sorry to bother you, then. I’ll talk to the sheriff about my complaint against Callie.”
Ice pricks the back of my neck. “Callie?”
“Yes, Callie Pike. She assaulted me.”
“You’re full of it.”
“I’m not. She threw hot coffee all over me the other day.”
“And did this quote assault unquote lead to any damages?”
“Yes, my skin was burned slightly, and my clothes were ruined.”
“And you want to file charges. Against Callie Pike. For spilling coffee on you. Am I correct?”
“Yes, you’re correct.”
“I’m going to try to give you the benefit of the doubt, Pat. I’m going to assume that you don’t realize how completely ridiculous you sound. I’m going to assume you actually think you can file charges against someone for spilling coffee.”
“Hey, I did my research. Some woman got a ton of money from McDonald’s when she spilled hot coffee on herself.”
“First of all, that was a civil lawsuit, not a criminal one. If you want to file those kind of charges, I suggest you find a private lawyer.”
