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When I sobbed harder, he stroked my hair and kissed my temple.
“And I’m sure he would’ve done everything the exact same way again if given a second chance. Because he loved you.”
It was the way he said loved in past
tense that broke me.
Dissolving into grief, I wilted against him and wept myself to sleep.
When I woke, I was lying on something hard, but my legs were slung over the side with my feet on the floor and my cheek was propped against a leg. It didn’t feel like Noel’s leg.
I sat up, wincing against the pain in my temples. After shoving my hair out of my face, I focused on Asher. Not expecting him at all, I just blinked.
“Hey, there,” he murmured, sympathy ruling his green gaze. “How’re you feeling?”
I glanced away and around the hospital’s waiting room to find everyone else had arrived while I was sleeping. Zoey lay tucked into Quinn’s lap fast asleep. Reese and Eva stood from where they’d been sitting with Pick and Mason. When they started toward me, I held up my hands, warding them away. I couldn’t handle anyone else consoling me right now. I only wanted Noel.
Or Oren.
But I couldn’t have Oren.
Pain slashed through me.
I glanced around again, but Noel wasn’t in the room. Neither were Brenda or Phil.
I sniffed and wiped at my dry, crusty face. “Where’s Noel? Have they brought out any news about Oren? How long have I been asleep?”
“Why don’t you lie back down?” Asher’s voice coaxed as he reached for me, but I recoiled from him.
Oren wouldn’t like me touching Asher.
“Where’s Noel?” I demanded, feeling a panic attack coming on.
No Oren. No Noel. I couldn’t handle this.
Reese clutched her hands to her heart. “He just stepped out to make a phone call home and check in. And no, there’s been no news about Ten. We’ve been here less than an hour. Noel said you’d just fallen asleep when we arrived.”
I nodded my thanks, ducked my face and hurried from the room to find my brother.
I heard his voice as I neared an intersection in the hall.
“No, there’s no news yet. He must…shit. He must be bad off if they haven’t come out to say anything yet. I just called to check in. No, actually, I had to hear your voice. I wish you were here with me.”
His own voice was choked and raw, and it stopped me in my tracks. He sounded about as heartbroken as I felt. It bruised my already tender feelings. Here, I’d been worried about nothing and no one but myself, and Noel was on the verge of losing his best friend.
As I clutched my stomach, Noel said, “No, don’t come. You said Colton’s still upset. He needs you. I’ll be okay. Just talking to you helps. Hearing your voice.”
After pausing to listen to a question, he sighed wearily. “She’s a complete mess. She’s hurting and blames herself, and fuck…I don’t know what to do for her. What if she ends up a nineteen-year-old widow because of this? I just hold her as she cries herself to sleep, and I try not to lose it myself in front of her. But God, Aspen. He was my best friend. What if he dies and the last things I said to him were—”
He hissed out a breath. “I know, but I still feel like shit. I was such a dick. I treated him awful, and he might die from saving both my brother and my sister’s lives. He truly fucking loved her, and I was too mad and felt too betrayed to even see that. I can’t…I just—”
When his voice broke, tears spilled down my cheeks. I hurried around the corner. His red wet eyes widened when they saw me.
“I’m sorry.” I rushed to him and hugged him. His arms immediately went around me. “I’m sorry, I was only thinking about me.”
He buried his face in my hair. “No. I’m sorry I was so fucking stubborn.”
We hugged and cried, and he finally ended his call with his wife. Time passed, I have no idea how much. Seconds, hours, minutes. It all seemed to be sucked into some surreal vacuum where none of this was really happening. It was just a crazy, awful dream, and I was going to wake up any time now. I’d open my eyes and be back in Oren’s bed with our legs tangled and his palm cupping my breast. Light would stream in through the windows and he’d crack open his eyes to send me one of his lazy, sexy morning grins.
