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It wasn’t fair. She should be able to recall her baby without bawling. She wanted those happy memories back. She needed them like she needed air.
But it wasn’t to be. Unconcerned about the guilt that would no doubt follow, she pictured Drew instead. Back in swimming trunks, he set his pale mixed drink aside and leaned toward her once again. She smiled, latching onto the image. He had such kind eyes, a safe and protective smile. She could languish in his company and never once fear anything. He seemed like the easy-going type that wouldn’t mind a clinger if something awful happened. He’d cuddle her, and unlike Ryan, would give any kind of support she craved.
He’d probably be a good daddy too. She remembered how he’d touched that baby’s head in his studio. So caring and gentle. A reflection of Lexie wavered through her consciousness, learning to walk from Mia’s arms. She imagined Drew catching her after three wobbly steps. He scooped her up into his arms and kissed her face until his beard stubble tickled her and made her wrinkle her nose.
Holding her close, he glanced toward Mia, and they shared a smile. "She’s growing so fast."
Mia nodded. "Pretty soon, she’ll be taking her first step down the wedding aisle."
Pulling Lexie close, Drew frowned and kissed her baby-fine hair. "No way. Not my little girl. I’m the only man for her. Right, Princess?"
Mia fell unconscious to that scene. Drew, who’d never even met her daughter, twirled Lexie—who’d never lived long enough to even take one step—in a circle. When he lifted Dream-Lexie up high, she screamed with giggles, begging him for more. Drifting into deep REM, Mia slept with a smile.
Chapter Eight
Mia sat at her computer, in her bedroom, shopping eBay for Piper’s birthday. She’d just placed her bid for a Louis Vuitton purse her roommate would die for when the doorbell rang. Clicking on confirm bid, she clicked back into another screen to see if she was high bidder.
"No," she muttered, digging her teeth into her bottom lip.
The doorbell chimed again before she remembered Piper was gone, working out at the gym this afternoon. Brushing her fingers over her mouth and down the front of her shirt to ensure there was no more evidence left of the Oreos she’d delved into half an hour earlier, she stood and hurried to the entrance.
She pulled the main door open before checking who’d come to visit. And suddenly, there stood Drew, waiting on the other side of her screen door, hands shoved deep into his pockets and facing the street as he watched a handful of children purchase ice cream from a traveling vendor.
He turned when she opened the door. Their gazes met and caught; she forgot to breathe.
"Hi," he said, sounding a little oxygen-deprived.
Not sure how to react, she stood there. A million responses burst through her. She could slam the door in his face, tell him he was a lying jerk … or she could open the screen and pull him into a grateful hug.
It felt so good to see him again. After dreaming about him with Lexie, he looked exactly like the vision she’d created. Even his smile was the same … though he hadn’t had that uncertain, apologetic look in his eyes last night when he’d pulled Lexie into his arms.
"You probably don’t believe me," he started. "But I actually came over here last time to apologize for the scene at my studio. But now that I think of it, I never did tell you how sorry I was, did I?" He winced and finished, "I only upset you more."
Mia didn’t answer. She merely stared at him.
He shifted weight from foot to foot. "Do you want me to apologize out here?" When she still refused to respond, he nodded and sent her a stiff smile. "Okay," he said. "That’s fine."
He blew out a breath and glanced up at the sky as if silently scanning his brain, trying to remember what he’d rehearsed to say. "Okay," he repeated. "I am sincerely sorry for misleading you the first time we met. I hope you realize I didn’t mean it for spite. Never for that. I did have a reason. And I never, ever meant to deceive or hurt you."
"I’m not hurt." She folded her arms over her chest to rub at her suddenly chilled arms.
No, she wasn’t hurt. She was devastated.
"Oh." He looked at her askance as if he didn’t beli
eve her, but he didn’t call her on it. Instead, he sucked in a breath and said, "Good. That’s good. I’d also like to apologize for disrespecting your wishes and reading the card that came with the roses."
He paused, giving her a chance to respond. She lifted an eyebrow, letting him know she needed more groveling. His lips tightened, repressing his amusement.
Glancing away, he continued. "I know you’re mad. But I did what I felt I had to do."
At her sharp frown, he quickly explained, "Mandy’s more than just a sister to me. See, my mom left when I was little. But it didn’t really faze me because … well, there was always Amanda. My sister pretty much raised me. She stepped into the slot of mother without even blinking, even though she was still in high school. I remember she had to quit the volleyball team so she could stay home with me every night."
Not sure if he was feeding her some sob story—whether it was the truth or a lie—to gain her sympathies so he could sneak some Piper information from her, she studied him a moment before curiosity caught the better of her.
"What about your dad? Where was he?"
He glanced down at his shoes. "He had to find a second job. We rarely saw him. Amanda was the one that kept our family together. I know it had to be hard for her. I certainly never made it any easier. I was a typical kid, always managing to get myself into trouble."
