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And I’d already reached my threshold of awkward for the day. I wasn’t exactly looking for more by staying in the company of her and her roommates. They’d just seen me fucking cry.
Before this whole fiasco started, I think the last time I’d cried had been when I was ten-years old and our Lab, Sal, had died. And even then, I’d run to my room and slammed the door to bawl on my bed with a pillow over my head so no one could see me.
I wasn’t a fan of this open weeping bullshit. I pretty much wanted to sink through the floor and cease to be seen by anyone else ever again.
But Bailey only snorted. “I went through the whole process of making you food; you’re eating, dammit.” She latched a firm hand around my arm and dragged me from the living room.
It didn’t seem to matter if I mentioned that hotdogs and cold baked beans weren’t exactly a “whole process” or not; she was determined.
So, six of us sat down to supper. Every seat at the dining room table was full. I had a feeling Bailey always sat on the end where she currently was in order to let each couple sit together on one side or another. So that meant I was left at the other end, opposite her.
I actually appreciated that. Facing the others was not high on my list of wishes at the moment. Still, sitting here at a table with these people was so freaking uncomfortable. And they were all so strangely silent.
Until Bailey gave a dramatic sigh and said, “For the love of God, someone say something before I start in again about how I think we should totally hook Jonah’s friend Aubrey up with Logan’s brother’s Jake.”
“Oh, Jesus,” the big guy groaned, covering his eyes before saying, “How many times do I have to tell you, just because they’re both gay, doesn’t automatically mean they should hook up.”
“But—”
“Would you try just any guy simply because he was hetero?” At Bailey’s scowl, Jonah added, “Jake’s an athlete. Aubrey’s into drama. They wouldn’t get along.”
“Well, we wouldn’t know that for sure unless we at least introduced them, now would we?” Bailey mumbled, before moodily clinking her spoon into a pile of pork and beans on her plate. “I’m just saying, it wouldn’t hurt to try hooking them up.”
“Oh, Lord,” Jonah groaned.
“I’m going to have to agree with Abbott on this one,” Designated Dave—er, Logan—finally spoke up. “I think my brother’s a little bit too elitist for Aubrey’s taste.”
“You mean, he’s a total freaking snob? Yeah, that’s for damn sure.” Bailey pointed her spoon at Logan. “I can’t believe you’re still giving that entire hoity toity family of yours another chance to be in your life after they kicked you out for, how many years? They seem so frigid and uptight whenever they come to visit you.”
Logan breathed out a sigh. “That’s just the way they are,” he explained. “It’s a work in progress. We’ll get there. Someday.” I could almost hear him silently add hopefully, and it made me think of my own family.
“Well, I don’t know how you could ever forgive them for the way they disowned you. I mean—Oh!”
Her gaze veered to me, and I could actually hear her thoughts. The word disowned had immediately made her think of me. My own stomach knotted at the memory, but it also had me glancing sideways as Logan and wondering what had happened there to make his family turn him out. He’d always been so quiet and straight-laced whenever I’d seen him at parties. Hell, my parents probably would’ve adored a son like him.
“I just had the strangest thought,” Bailey announced, “Xander killed someone and didn’t go to jail, while Beckett committed no crime and did go jail. Isn’t that crazy ironic?”
I had no idea who Xander was, so I didn’t have an answer. But strangely enough, no one else at the table could seem to reply, either. They all froze with another awkward silence. I glanced around, wondering what I was missing.
“Shit,” Bailey added a second later. “That was inconsiderate, wasn’t it?”
The redhead—Tess, I think her name was—nodded and held her fingers an inch apart. “A lil’ bit, yes.”
“Sorry.” Wincing, Bailey swung around to plead to th
e other couple. “I’m so sorry.”
Logan lifted a hand, immediately excusing her. “It’s fine.”
“It was self-defense.” Paige turned to me of all people as if it was vital for her to convince me of that. Then she frowned and said, “Kind of. They were just drunk teenagers who got into a fistfight, and he was knocked to the ground, where he hit his head and died. Total freak accident.”
Her eyes were a dark pleading brown as if she needed me to understand that the murder committed had been totally innocent. “Okay,” I answered, nodding to let her know I wasn’t about to question her. But then I had to glance around and ask, “Who’s Xander?”
Logan made an amused, but also kind of pain-filled sound before lifting his hand. “I am. My name is Logan Xander.”
I blinked, wondering why the hell everyone at the fraternity called him Designated Dave then. I’d met him a few times when I’d been drunk off my ass. He was a sober driver who gave people lifts home from parties. I’d used his services before, and remembered him being nothing but quiet and considerate to the drunk idiots he helped, while they weren’t always that great in return. But now that I thought about it, it’d been a while since I’d seen him working the parties. He’d probably met Paige and—
It suddenly clicked in my head what Bailey and Paige had said Xander had done. My eyes widened. “Holy shit,” I blurted. He’s accidently murdered someone in an innocent fistfight. “That had to suck. I’ve been in fights plenty in my life. I can’t even imagine what would’ve happened if any of them had ended that way.” Then another awful thought struck. “Was he a friend?”
