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“Yeah, uh…” Indy cringed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Maybe I should introduce everyone first. Guys, this is Bison. He, uh, he’s not from the Outer Realms.”
Though I was expecting him to say something to that effect, it still blew my mind.
Baldly, I asked, “Where’re you supposed to be from, then?”
“Earth,” Bison answered with a proud grin. “Third rock from the sun, baby.”
I shook my head, slowly. “Never heard of it.”
This day just kept getting stranger and stranger. Now, I was learning that people not only lived on plants but rocks, too. Bizarre.
“He’s one of the most recent Replacements to come through,” Indigo explained. “He arrived here eighteen years ago from…” He glanced toward Bison. “Tahiti, was it?”
Growing solemn, the tall man nodded. “Yep, got sucked here with my boat’s captain, Bert, who didn’t make it through the initial journey alive, and my girl, Serena, but she and I split a couple years back.” He blew out a long, sad whistle. “So I haven’t seen her in about five years.” He lifted sad eyes to the princess. “It was a pretty nasty break.”
Nicolette, bleeding heart that she was, reached out to touch his arm. “I’m so sorry to hear that.”
Bison nodded as if it were no big deal, though he stepped closer to her as if seeking comfort and placed his big hand on top of hers. “She got one of those fancy tattoos like you have there, found her true love, and ran off with him. I’ve been alone ever since.”
“How terrible.”
“It is,” Bison agreed, melting right into her personal space as if he were trying to—
Hey!
Realizing he was making a play for my soul mate, I cleared my throat. Loudly. When the big man glanced my way, I arched censorious eyebrows, silently
warning him away.
He seemed to understand he was encroaching on the wrong territory, because he immediately dropped his hand from Nicolette’s and shifted a respectful step back.
A brief, uncomfortable silence filled the cottage. I risked a look toward Nicolette just as she shifted her nervous, flushed gaze my way. Immediately, we both turned away again.
Next to us, Indigo cleared his throat. “So…” He tried to continue but didn’t get any further than that because the ass was too busy grinning and trying not to laugh.
“Yeah,” Bison seemed to agree, waving us past the moment. “But never mind that. I never got your names.”
“Oh. This is Nicolette,” Indigo said. “The princess of Donnelly.”
Bison’s dark eyebrows shot sky high. “Princess?” he repeated. “You mean, that princess?”
“Yes.” Indigo answered. “And this…” He hitched his head my way. “Is Farrow, from here in Far Shore. He was tasked with the duty of kidnapping Nicolette and bringing her to King Torrance for, well, any number of unpleasantries. But things happened along the way, and he decided to save her instead, murder the king himself, and help us return to Donnelly.”
“Damn, Indiana Jones.” Bison whistled in awe and set his hands on his hips, nodding slowly. “You just find yourself saddled to one adventure after another, don’t you? I swear, I’m going to get you a fedora, whip, and leather jacket one of these days.”
Nicolette leaned toward me, whispering, “What in God’s name is he talking about? And why does he keep calling Indigo Indiana Jones?”
I shrugged, absolutely lost by the entire conversation.
Bison turned to me, considering me from head to toe. “So you’re the Bastard Betrayer, huh?”
I blinked, not expecting to hear that title all this way from Blayton. “Excuse me?”
Bison confirmed that I’d heard him right, explaining, “Word travels fast out here to these parts. We learned the king was gone by noon yesterday.” Shaking his head, he added, “Can’t say as I’ll mourn the old jackass. He never messed with me personally, but he definitely put the dick in dictator, if you know what I mean.”
“What other news have you heard?” Indigo asked.
Bison made a face as if to say not much. “The rumor is that his own illegitimate son turned on him and did him in.” When he lifted his eyebrows my way, I nodded once, confirming I was the king’s bastard we were discussing. So Bison nodded too, and continued, “The queen’s fit to be tied over the whole thing. She’s taken over, running the realm, and has gone completely mad with desperation to get you back after you escaped her dungeons.” He rolled his hand encouragingly when I frowned in confusion over that.
