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7
MEGAN
“Are you ready to go?” Mom asks, poking her head around the doorframe of my room.
“Yeah, just grabbing my shoes.” She nods her head, then turns to go back downstairs. I’m headed to my first-ever gynecologist appointment today and am a little nervous.
Mom gave me the gist about what they’ll do, but it all sounds a bit crazy. I’m preparing to be out of my comfort zone the entire time. I’m glad I waited until I was older to do this instead of at sixteen when I barely understood what my body was capable of doing. Not that I fully understand what it does now.
When I head downstairs, Mom and Gabe are standing by the door to the garage, waiting on me. Mom has on white capri pants, a pretty, blush pink blouse, and her straight, blonde hair is teased to perfection. Gabe, who is basically my dad’s twin, has on khakis and a blue polo shirt. His light brown hair is gelled back, making him look completely pulled together.
“Going somewhere fancy, bub?” I tease, knowing full well this is his regular outfit of choice.
“No, I wear this every day.” He sighs as if he’s exasperated with me.
We walk through the garage to get into Mom’s car. “Sorry you’re having to go to the doctor with me.” I ruffle Gabe’s hair before he gets in the car.
“It’s okay. It’s always quiet in waiting rooms. I can read the new biography I got at the library.”
At this point, Gabe’s interests shouldn’t still surprise me. The kid is a sponge for knowledge, but sometimes, I have to remind myself he’s only ten.
Mom drives us to the doctor’s office in Westlake, which is the next town over from Sonoma. After we park, we walk into the lobby of the office that looks like your typical waiting room. Brown carpet, matching chairs with a weird, wavy pattern, tables covered with outdated magazines, and a counter with a sliding glass window to check in when you arrive.
I’m handed a bunch of paperwork that Mom has to help me fill out, then they take me back. My hands start to shake as nerves take over. Thankfully, Mom and Gabe stay out in the waiting room to give me privacy.
After putting on the paper gown they gave me, I sit on the exam table to wait for the doctor. I wish it didn’t take so long for the doctor to see you. It’s giving me time to contemplate what’s about to happen and why I’m doing it in the first place.
After our date a couple of days ago, I’m glad I’m getting on birth control. I’ve never had so many feelings course through me as I did when Todd kissed me. It was nothing like my first kiss.
To be fair, I was thirteen, and it was with Cooper, who’s more like a brother to me than anything else. We both decided it was super weird, and neither one of us wanted to do it with each other again. The only reason we did it in the first place was because we wanted to know what it was like. Definitely not because we were attracted to each other.
A knock on the door pulls me from my thoughts. The doctor who comes in has beautiful, ebony skin, and her dark hair is pulled back into a ponytail.
“Hi, Megan, I’m Dr. Jensen. How are you doing today?” Her friendly smile helps the tension drain from my shoulders.
“I’m good, a little nervous since this is my first visit.”
“Totallyunderstandable. I’ll make sure to explain everything I’m going to do before I do it so you know what’s coming. I see you just had a birthday!”
“Yes, I did. Finally, eighteen!”
“Well, happy belated birthday.” She smiles. “As far as the appointment goes, we’ll start with some medical questions. You may not be able to answer all of them, but just do your best, okay?”
She goes through several different questions I’m surprisingly able to answer.
“Okay, last question, anything weird going on in your body that hasn’t happened before?”
“Um…well, I’ve had a few dizzy spells, and I’ve been cramping, even though I’m not on my period.”
“How long has that been going on?”
“A few months now, I guess.”
“Okay, we’ll do a quick blood draw to double-check your levels, but I’m not too concerned.” She starts gathering instruments for the exam, pulling things from drawers around the room.
True to her word, she explains everything before she does it. While it is uncomfortable, it’s not as bad as I thought it would be. Especially since I’m going to have to do this regularly now. A lab tech comes to do the blood draw a few minutes after I’m done with the exam. It’s over in a flash, and all that’s left is to get my prescription.
When Dr. Jensen comes back into the room, she goes over all the important details I need to know about taking birth control. It’s overwhelming, so I end up taking notes to not forget anything. As the appointment ends, I have this weird feeling of growing up. Like I’m finally a woman having had this experience. It’s both exciting and a little sad to go through this milestone.
When I’m back out in the lobby, Mom and Gabe gather their stuff to head out to the car.
As we walk, I update Mom on the appointment. “She wanted to run some blood work since I’ve been having those dizzy spells, so I’ll have to come back when they get the results.”
“Okay. How are you feeling?”
“Grown up.”
Mom looks over at me with one of those motherly smiles that say she knows a lot about what I'm going through and is there for me if I need her. She’s always been good at knowing when I need words of advice or if I just need to know she’s there for me. It makes me admire her even more. I hope I’ll be as good of a mom to my kids as she is to me.
* * *
“Isn’tit the weirdest thing you’ve ever experienced?” Natalie asks. She’s sitting in my white chair while me, Lucy, and Sara sit on the floor, painting our toenails.
“It was definitely bizarre and super uncomfortable to have some random lady up in my business,” I respond.
The girls came over to hang out, so naturally, I told them about going to the doctor today. We’ve had an open and honest policy between us since we were little. It doesn’t matter if it’s bad, sad, or amazing, we want to know what’s going on. It’s made us a lot closer knowing we have each other to rely on when we need anything.
“So, does this mean you and Todd are going to do it?” Sara asks with a teasing grin on her face. The polish wand hangs in her hand as she waits for my answer.
I bury my face in my hands as heat creeps up into my cheeks. “I don’t know!” I groan. “It would be a huge step for me.”
“Just because Todd is every girl’s fantasy—” Lucy starts.
“Besides ours. Yuck,” Nat interrupts.
“Right, besides ours, doesn’t mean you have to do it with him at all. You only recently started dating each other. There’s no reason to push anything just because you’ve started protecting yourself,” she continues.
“Thanks, Luce.” I smile at her. “It’s not totally about not wanting to because Lord knows I do, it’s more about it being the official line we’ll never be able to uncross.”
“That’s fair, but if you love him like I think you do, isn’t the line already crossed? You’ve already been out on a few dates, you’ve even made out,” Natalie points out. She’s also right. If we were to stop dating now, we’d never be able to go back to how things were before. We’ve already crossed so many lines, going back to our old friendship is pretty much out of the question.
“You’re right. At this point, there’s no going back, so I might as well enjoy our time together.”
“I like that. You’re not putting any pressure on yourself, just enjoying each other's company, only getting down and dirty if it’s right,” Sara says.
“Exactly!” I say as Sara goes back to painting my toes. “Nat, how's Jason?”
“Eh, boring. He’s not exactly my type, so it didn’t last long,” she says with a nonchalant wave.
“In other words, he’s not Tucker James, so she doesn’t want to have anything to do with him,” Sara teases.
“Oh, you hush over there.” Natalie grins at Sara. Natalie has had a crush on Tucker since we were little and refuses to do anything about it. He’s a grade ahead of us, a little bit mysterious, and a lot of a loner. Nobody really hangs out with him, which is kind of sad if I think about it. I can’t really blame Nat’s refusal since I’ve been in love with Todd for about the same amount of time she’s been in love with Tucker and never did anything about my feelings, either.
“What about you, Luce? Did you and Nathan hit it off?” I ask.
“Definitely not. I’ll wait until college.”
Lucy had her heart broken by an upperclassman our sophomore year. Ever since then, she’s sworn off boys until college. I’m surprised she’s stuck to her guns for as long as she has.
I look around my room at these strong, capable girls and feel incredibly lucky to have them as my best friends. Together, we can handle anything.
