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From the corner of my eye, I saw Maria press her fingers to her temples. She knew that she would be up half the night listening to me moan about how unfair it is to be a princess, without the freedom to live my own life. As much as I knew there were those whose lives were much harder than my own, sometimes I envied them.
Somehow, I managed a somewhat convincing, “I’d be happy to play for our guests, mother,” as the hairdresser ruthlessly attacked my tangled damp hair with a fine-toothed comb.
CHAPTER 8
Anika
I arrived early to the dinner and was escorted to my place on the royal dais, the big rectangular table that was positioned in front of the assembled crowd. People were still milling around, having conversations, and enjoying champagne brought in high glasses by livery men in full formal dress.
Scanning the big round tables spread out in front of me in the great hall, I recognized fewer than half the faces, if that many at all. My mother and stepfather had spared no expense for this dinner, however—I saw that at a glance. The room sparkled with thousands of candles and shimmering crystal glasses.
At first, I was alone on the dais. My mother and stepfather would sit on either side of me; to my stepfather’s left would sit Maksim as the heir apparent. I looked at his empty chair and wondered if he’d even show up. It wouldn’t be the first time that he’d ditched one of these dinners.
Secretly, I hoped he would show. But I didn’t dare indulge myself in thinking about that too much at the moment. I knew that any thought of him would make my cheeks flush and cause my mother to stare at me with her icy glare.
I was never any good at working the room, and this time I didn’t even try. Maria stood close behind me, hands clasped and head bowed. I glanced back to look at her as I spread my napkin on my lap.
“I’m glad you’re here,” I said.
“Are you kidding? I wouldn’t miss it.” She grinned sarcastically and I stifled a laugh.
I tried to get comfortable in my chair, but every movement I made forced the whale bones of my corset to jab into my hips and back. Miserably, I sucked in my stomach and straightened out my silverware.
The sound of the dinner bell cut through the chatter of the people, and everybody flooded between the tables to find their assigned seats. The table in the center of the room was the biggest and had the most lavish centerpiece by far.
The emblem of my stepfather’s kingdom, which was now also my mother’s emblem, was a white hart stag beneath a crescent moon. It was said that long ago an ancestor of the royal family had discovered the kingdom of Estana after a journey across the wide ocean. The emblem of his family had been a moon and three stars, which had eventually become a moon and a stag with three eyes, and then simply a stag and the moon.
Scattered on every table were wooden stag statues, which were always part of the floral arrangements when we had grand dinners. But there, in the big center table, there were also carved bulls, clearly placed there on behalf of our guests. I was no herald, but I knew the bull was the symbol of the royal line of Nemenia. The men of their delegation were mostly big and mostly dark eyed, ruddy-cheeked and slightly impolite. The women looked secretive, also mostly dark-eyed, and beautiful, exotic. But somehow unnerving. Like wild cats.
My mother and stepfather took their places on the dais; my mother smelled too strongly of perfume, but she was very much in her element. There was hardly anything she enjoyed more than a big dinner. My stepfather, too, was in rare form; he was a dreadful human being, as far as I was concerned, but he did have a certain strange magnetism. I glanced at him and smiled, admiring the jewels in his massive ceremonial crown.
Then, from a side entrance to the great hall, appeared Maksim. He looked angry and annoyed, as usual. But, I thought with my heart pounding, at least he was here.
Soup was served and I ate it just as my mother had taught me, sweeping the spoon away from me in small, polite scoops and dabbing my lips between each spoonful. I was determined not to give her any reason to scold me tonight. Salad and the first course went off without much trouble. But the big middle table was growing increasingly rowdy with each passing tray of champagne and spirits.
Most of the noise and crude laughter seemed to emanate from one man, seated directly in front of me, though fairly far away. Not so far away that I couldn’t get a good look at him, though.
