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Chapter eight
Daphne
Myfingertipstingledas the excitement zinged through me and my heart was pounding so hard I thought my ribs might explode. Glancing again at my reflection in the mirror of Miss Ellie’s guest bathroom, I tried to see myself as he might. I wanted him to see me, not just Stone’s little sister. I wanted him to see that I was a grown-up person with thoughts and feelings and opinions.
Not that those counted for much in my world. After all, a young woman should know her place, as my mother would say.
It was total crap.
I was so tired of being told what to wear and what to say, who to talk to and who to look down on. Just once I wanted someone to ask me what I wanted, what I thought about something.
I wanted to matter.
Like I did that day.
The day when my feelings were the sole concern of a stranger. A stranger who seemed so huge and rough, but was kind and tender when he spoke to me. He was real, treating me nicely, not because of who my father was, but because he actually cared.
I stared once again at the mirror, taking in my navy-blue sundress as it fell down my skinny frame. I had curled my hair earlier, wanting to look my best. My mother always made our maid, Tijana, braid my hair, but I liked it down. I thought it made me look older. There were more curls on one side of my head than the other because I wasn’t great at using the curling iron with my left hand yet, but I didn’t think Silas would notice.
When Stone said that he was back in town, my reaction had been instant. First, I had smiled. Like, a huge smile. When I caught the look my sister shot me, I ducked my head, feeling my cheeks burning. Mother always wanted to cover my blushing cheeks with makeup, but dad said that I was still too young.
She did it when he wasn’t around, though.
Once my initial excitement had died down, my head started spinning. I was glad we had been sitting at the breakfast table because otherwise I might have fallen over or passed out. I bounced my leg under the table, listening to Stone tell Miss Ellie that Silas had secured a week’s leave from the army, and that he was going to be coming by after lunch to pick him up. The two of them were going mudding, whatever that meant, and then they would be at a party, likely all night, Stone thought.
That left me with a very small window of time to get him to notice me again, and I was not going to waste it.
Once breakfast was finished, I helped Miss Ellie clear the dishes quickly, then raced upstairs to change. I had ditched my denim shorts and tank top—the one that showed exactly how late to the party my boobs were—and slid into the best dress that I had brought with me. Yanking my hair out of the elastic, I had dug through Connie’s bags until I found the curling iron, burning myself exactly three times before I figured out how to hold it with my small hands.
I was standing at the mirror, holding my eyelid down with one hand while I attempted to smear some eyeshadow on with the other, when I heard Constance’s voice behind me.
“You’re wasting your time.”
Frowning, I turned to glare at her. “Buzz off, Connie.”
Constance let out a sound that was most definitely unladylike and stepped into the bathroom with me. The space was small, so much smaller than the giant bathrooms we had in Manhattan, but I liked it better. Back home, everything was cold; the marble floors, the plain gray walls, and all the boring white leather furniture that made me feel like I was living in a museum.
Here at Stone’s place, Miss Ellie kept everything warm. The floors were wood, and all the blankets on the beds had flower patterns on them. Even the curtains were cute and lacy. Being in this house made me feel like when you stand on the grass in the summertime; full of sunshine and happiness, like school was never gonna start again and you could eat ice cream for dinner and no one would care.
Manhattan was definitely not an ice cream for dinner kind of place.
“I’m just saying,” Constance continued, like my asking her to leave didn’t matter to her in the least.
Which it didn’t, because Constance only cared about Constance. “It’s not like he’s even going to look your way. What are you expecting to happen, Daphne? He’s twenty-three years old. You’re eleven.”
I grit my teeth, switching from one eye to the other and doing my best to make the color the same shape on both while I thought over what Constance had said.
I knew Silas was older than me. Like, majorly older. It’s not like I was expecting him to marry me or anything. I just wanted to see if he was still the same guy. The one that looked at me like I was special and important and not just in the way all the time.
I was so tired of being in everyone’s way.
“I know how old he is, Constance,” I sassed, refusing to look at her. “I’m not stupid. It’s not like I’m a little kid anymore anyway.”
Constance rolled her eyes, picking up the tweezers off the counter and going to town on her eyebrows. I didn’t know what she thought she was gonna pluck because they were already so thin, you’d think she’d drawn them on with a marker, but whatever.
“You’re always going to be a little kid in his eyes, Daphne,” she stated flatly, her eyes finding mine in the mirror. “A man like that? He wants a grown woman. Hell, if I even talked to you about what kinds of things he and Stone were going to get up to later tonight, you’d be scarred for life.” Tossing the tweezers back into the makeup bag, Constance turned and crossed her arms, staring at me with her patented ‘I know everything and you don’t’ glare. “Just don’t say I didn’t warn you when he shows up this afternoon and doesn’t give you the time of day.” She made her way into the bedroom, stopping when she reached the door to make sure she delivered one last blow. “Try not to embarrass yourself, okay?”
Taking a deep breath, I bit my lip and blinked back the stupid tears that had started gathering in my eyes.
Constance was wrong; she had to be. Silas was not the kid of guy who would overlook me the way everyone else always did. He would smile at me like he did before, and he would call me Princess and my heart would get all squishy again.
I just wanted that feeling back. The one I had only ever felt with him.
Shaking my head, I reached again for the eyeshadow, but froze when I heard the sound of truck tires coming up the gravel drive. Dashing out of the bathroom, I didn’t even stop long enough to put on my sandals before flying out of the house and on to the big porch. My smile was so wide, my cheeks hurt, but I couldn’t help it.
Because there he was, sitting behind the wheel of that same beat up old truck, riding up the driveway and leaving a cloud of dust behind him.
The Texas heat was oppressive, but I hardly noticed as the truck came to a stop over near the barn, the same place he had parked it before. As he got out of the cab, I nearly gasped at how different Silas looked, wearing black cargo pants and a grey t-shirt with the words ‘US Army’ stretched across the front. It looked like it was too small for him; I hoped he had a bigger one at home.
Stone was there to greet him, already dressed in jeans and a plaid shirt, baseball hat on backwards and looking ready to go. I needed to hurry if I wanted to catch Silas before he left again. Walking from the front door over to the side of the house, I trailed my fingers along the railing, holding my head high and trying to look as grown up as I could. I was nearing the steps, ready to make my grand entrance, when a second vehicle started coming down the driveway, this time a small convertible with bright red paint. Just the sight of it caused a slimy feeling in my stomach, twisting painfully as if it was suddenly full of snakes.
Turning to the car, Silas grinned and slapped Stone on the back. The two of them leaned against the tailgate of the truck, arms crossed in identical poses, as they waited for whoever was in that car.
Grasping onto the post at the top of the stairs, I stood there, watching as that car got closer and closer, knowing that whatever happened next was gonna suck.
A lot.
And I was so right.
The car skidded to a stop, music blaring as the passenger got out, not even opening the door, but hopping right over the side with a high-pitched squeal.
“Si!” she called, giggling like a crazy person. I watched in horror as she ran to him, her not-at-all late boobs bouncing in her stupid tiny tank top, just like the one I had taken off upstairs only a short time ago. Of course, it would never have looked like that on me, but that was besides the point.
As she neared him, Silas stepped away from the truck, holding his arms out for her, and she jumped into them, her legs wrapping round his waist and her mouth latching on to his like a sucker fish.
I stared in horror as they kissed right in front of me. I could actually see their tongues moving, going in and out of each other’s mouths. Was that supposed to happen? I bet he could taste what she had for breakfast.
Gross.
The longer they kissed, the more my stomach hurt, but I couldn’t look away. I could hear Stone and the other girl, the one who was driving, talking, but I couldn’t focus on the words long enough to understand them. My mind was too busy swirling with disappointment and anger and something else entirely, something I had never felt before.
