Page 84 of Dotted Lines (Runaway 5)

Two stupid men.

“I should have come to you anyway. Despite the Facebook pictures. I assumed you were happy and had moved on, but I should have come to find you.”

“Except then I wouldn’t have August.” She gave me a sad smile. “Timing was never on our side, was it?”

“No, it wasn’t.” If I had looked her up a year later, after Devan had been out of the picture, or if she had come here a year earlier, before Holly . . .

Or if at nineteen, I hadn’t been so wrapped up in my mother’s words.

You’re a piece of shit, Karson. You’re worthless.

Get out of my sight. I hate you. I hate looking at you.

You are nothing. A disgrace. You’re a fuckup.

“My mom died,” I blurted.

Clara tensed. “When?”

“Not long before I moved to Elyria. After she died, I wanted to get out of Temecula for good.”

“Is that why you came back here? When Gemma hired the PI the first time, he’d said you were here. That always seemed so crazy to me. I figured you’d be long gone like the rest of us.”

“Yeah.” I sighed. “I got a call one day when I was living in San Diego the second time from a police officer here in Temecula. Mom had been in a car accident and was in a coma.”

“Karson, I’m so sorry.”

“Should I tell you this? It might be hard to hear.”

“Drunk driver?” she guessed. Her own parents had been killed by a drunk driver, and the last thing I wanted was to cause her any pain.

“Yeah.” I nodded. “I’d expected the drunk to be her, but it wasn’t. I think that’s the only reason I came back. If she had hurt someone . . . well, there’s a lot I struggle to forgive my mother for. That would have been a deal breaker.”

“You came back to take care of her, didn’t you?”

“She probably didn’t deserve it. But I did it anyway.” I lifted a shoulder. “It took me a long time to learn that she was sick. That she hated herself so much that it was all she knew. That her taking that hate out on me was because I was the only person she had. And it took me a long time to let go of her ghost. To realize I was not the person she told me I was.”

“You’re a good man, Karson Avery.”

I dropped my eyes to August, curled up between us. This kid didn’t even know how lucky he was to have a mother like Clara.

“After she passed, I felt like I could leave it all behind. That’s when I moved to Elyria.”

“Your fresh start.”

I nodded. “We all needed them, didn’t we?”

“We did.” Clara gave me a sad smile. August squirmed on the couch, an arm flailing in the other direction. Clara scooped him into her arms and pushed up off the couch, carrying him to the adjoining room. The rustle of clothes and the thud of shoes dropping to the floor was my hint to leave.

It was time. It was time to say goodbye. To get back to life in Elyria.

To Holly.

She and I had a shot. We had a chance at a future. I hadn’t felt like that about any woman I’d dated before, not Londyn. Not even Clara. Not the women I’d met along my way. Mostly because I’d been too young, but with Holly, there was a real chance.

Like Clara said herself, timing had never been on our side. Maybe that was for a reason.

I waited for Clara to finish with August. She emerged, closing his bedroom door. Then I spoke the words I’d been dreading all evening. “It’s been so great to see you. To meet August.”