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“And I hate that he’s programmed to expect the worst of the men in his life.”
“I’m going to show him something better. I’ll lead by example.”
“Knowing the men who raised you, that makes Mateo a very lucky boy.”
“Even if something were to go down between us, which isn’t going to happen, I’d still be there for him. You have my word on that.”
“Love you for that and a million other reasons.”
“Love you, too, for two million reasons.”
As I lay my head on his shoulder, I realize I do that a lot. Rest my head on his strong shoulder, knowing he’s as solid and reliable as he seems. Maybe he’s been “toxic” to other women. But for me and my son, he’s just what we need.
At some point, I must’ve dozed off, because I come to suddenly when the plane touches down with a jolt.
“That’s just the landing,” Nico says. “There’s going to be a loud roar, but that’s the pilots slowing the plane.”
I’m glad he told me that because the roar would’ve terrified me.
“That was so fun, Mama. I can’t wait to fly again!”
“We’ll fly home on Monday. That’s in three days.”
“Yay!”
While we wait for our turn to get off the plane, Nico puts Mateo’s backpack on his little shoulders and holds his hand.
I’m relieved to see Mateo acting comfortable with him after last night. I felt so bad for Nico, who’s been nothing but kind and generous to us. But sadly, I understand all too well why Mateo was afraid. I hope that over time, he’ll forget the way his father used to scream and yell and sometimes hit me when he was in one of his rages.
That seems like a long time ago now, but the scars still run deep in both of us.
We walk toward baggage claim, where I’m supposed to meet my father. I’m suddenly full of nerves. What if he doesn’t like me or takes one look at Mateo and sees nothing but his limitations? What if—
“Stop spinning.” Nico gives my shoulder a squeeze. “He’s going to love you both. How could he not?”
“Now you can see inside my mind, too?”
“I know you, and you worry too much.”
“For good reason!”
“Maybe, but you’ve got nothing to worry about here. He was so eager to meet you guys, he sent tickets for this week. Not next week. This week. It’s going to be fine. I know it.”
“Thank you for saying what I needed to hear.”
“Just relax and enjoy every minute.”
With him by my side, holding the hand of my little boy, I’m able to let go of the tight knot of stress I’ve carried with me for so long, I barely recall life without it. It’s been like a constant ache in my chest. I’m not sure if it’s being away from Miami, getting to meet my dad or being with Nico, but I feel better than I have, well, ever.
I suspect most of that is because of Nico’s steady, loving presence. When he tells me everything is going to be okay, I believe him.
We take the escalator down to the baggage claim area, and I recognize my father instantly. He’s holding a sign that says Sofia, Mateo and Nico! The exclamation mark indicates he’s as excited to meet me as I am to meet him.
As we move toward him, I notice there’s more gray in his hair than there was in the picture he sent me, but even from ten feet away, I see the same resemblance I spotted in the photo. I look like him. There’s no denying it.
And then he’s hugging me, and I’m hugging him like it’s the most natural thing in the world to be hugging this man who gave me life.
When we pull apart, we’re both crying as we stare at each other.
