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His smile was blinding as he kissed me, slipping his tongue into my mouth and stroking it against mine in slow, sure movements. I felt him pushing my shirt up my side until he couldn’t get it any further, and I reluctantly broke the kiss as I lifted just far enough off the mattress that he could pull it off. His eyes flared when he saw that I hadn’t bothered with a bra – which I would have thought would be evident since I was still in my pajama bottoms – and he ever so gently palmed my waist, pulling me back toward him and claiming my mouth again.
I couldn’t help the whimper I let out as I felt the warmth of his skin against mine, the strength of his arms around me, the sheer perfection of our lips and tongues moving effortlessly together. Needing to feel more of him against me, I tentatively lifted my leg and hooked it over his hip. He broke the kiss on a gasp, pulling back to look me in the eyes as he slid his hand down my waist and over my ass to grip my thigh.
“You okay with this, baby?” he whispered.
I nodded, then remembered. “Yes.”
That earned me one of the lopsided smiles I loved so much. “I love you.”
“I love you too. So much,” I whispered. “I’ll tell you if I need to stop. I promise. But I just…I need you right now.”
He brushed his lips over mine, then sucked my bottom lip into his mouth, swiping his tongue over it before letting it go with a soft pop.
“I need you every second of the day, Ky,” he murmured. “But especially now.”
“Then don’t stop,” I breathed as I kissed him again.
Ian groaned quietly as his tongue slid back into my mouth and started moving with mine, and the rest of the world just melted away as we kissed and touched and held each other so tight that I could barely tell where I ended and he began. It wasn’t long before our kisses and caresses turned heated and the now-familiar tingling between my legs started, making me rock against his thigh, in desperate need of friction. Tightening my leg around his hip, I pressed harder against him, and that made him let out a moan as he moved his hand to my ass, encouraging my movements.
“That’s it, gorgeous,” he breathed as he trailed light kisses along my jaw and down my neck. “Just feel. Take what you need.”
I moaned as he pressed his leg harder against my center, then whimpered when it only gave me a weak echo of what I really wanted and needed right now. What I wanted was for him to touch me like he had on Friday. I wantedhimto be the one to bring me over the edge. But I wasn’t brave enough to ask him for that, so instead I tried to speed up my movements again, and a strangled moan caught in my throat as, once again, the delicious friction failed to deliver.
Like he just knew what I needed, Ian rolled me onto my back and slid his hand down my stomach as he claimed my mouth again.
“Can I touch you, baby?” he asked.
“Please,” I panted, a little embarrassed at how needy I sounded.
“I told you, you never have to beg,” he reminded me as he dipped his hand under the fabric of my pajama pants. “I’ve got you, gorgeous.”
Tugging my panties to the side, he pressed his thumb against my clit, and I gasped and arched my hips, needing more. As he gave me a kiss so deep I saw stars, two fingers slid inside me, curling to brush against that sweet spot. I whimpered into his mouth, pressing back against his hand, and he started to pump his fingers in and out of me as he rubbed tight circles over my sensitive nerves.
“Oh, God,” I moaned as pressure started to coil tighter and tighter. “Don’t stop.”
His lips left mine and latched onto a nipple, sucking hard. I groaned as I threaded my fingers through his short hair in an attempt to keep his mouth where it was. But that only worked for a minute before he released the bud and trailed his tongue over to the other breast, hovering over me as he tugged that nipple into his mouth and started to pick up the pace with his hand. I started to rock my hips in time with his strokes, and soon, I was crying out his name as I shattered into a million blissful pieces. He didn’t stop working until I closed my legs and pushed his hand away, too sensitive to take any more.
As he claimed my mouth again, just like last time, I felt his arousal pressing up against me, and leaving him unsatisfiedagainafter what we’d just shared together didn’t seem right. I slid my hand down his waist, palming his hip as I considered the precipice I was standing on.
Could I really do this? Could I actually touch himtherewithout having a panic attack?
Right now, I felt like I could, but what if I couldn’t? What if I started and had to stop because it was just too much, too fast? Or what if just seeing – or feeling – his dick sent me off the deep end? That wouldn’t be fair to him either.
“You don’t have to doanythingyou don’t want to, Ky,” he whispered, like he was reading my mind, as he pulled back to look me in the eyes. “This is about you, not me.”
“But what if Iwantit to be about you?” I asked quietly, then let my eyes dart down to the bulge in his gray sweats. “Can I?”
His eyes got as big as saucers, and it seemed like he was too shocked to speak, so I answered his unspoken question.
“Yes, I’m sure,” I promised. “I’ll stop if I need to, and I’m not asking because I think you expect me to. I’m doing it becauseIwant to. I still don’t think I’m ready foreverythingyet, but the only way I’m going to get there is by taking away some of the unknowns. I’m not afraid. Not like that. Just nervous.”
He chuckled softly. “Then I’m all yours, gorgeous. But it’s still about you. Anything I get out of it is just icing on the cake.”
Before I lost my nerve, I brought my mouth back to his, and he kissed me slowly and deeply. And as our mouths moved effortlessly together, I moved my hand from his hip to snake it between us, tentatively palming him through his sweats and squeezing slightly. He let out a quiet moan, pressing himself further against me, so I rubbed my hand over the bulge and squeezed again, which made him moan again.
My heart started to race a little, but it wasn’t in fear. It was in anticipation. I loved that a simple touch from me could elicit that kind of sound from him.
Taking a deep breath for courage, I slipped my hand under the elastic of his sweatpants, but quickly realized that wasn’t going to work, so I took it back out and started to push his pants down, needing them gone. He gave me one more searing kiss before lifting his hips and sliding his pants and boxer briefs down just enough to free himself from their confines.
