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“I want us to be friends.”
“Friends?” he scoffed, looking completely taken aback. “Barlow… Fuck…” He chuckled and sucked his teeth. “Friends? Barlow, what makes you think we can do friends? Last I recall, we both realised we may as well have been accidentally dating and we needed space to work ourselves out.”
“Last I recall you had nothing to offer me. But, I don’t believe you.”
“Piper, we’ve been through this. I will never be that guy.”
“I’m not asking you to be!” I yelled. “I’m not asking you to be anyone but you, and you’re my friend–”
“I’m the town degenerate that you happened to fuck. I wouldn’t equate that to friends.”
“Why are you making this so hard?”
He shrugged. “I’m not doing anything but being honest. You want the truth Barlow? When I said I had nothing to give you, I meant anything. All right? I can’t be there for you the way you want me to be–”
“Why? Because we can’t keep our hands to ourselves?”
“No. Because I’m not that guy. I don’t do feelings and hand-holding bullshit. I drink. I smoke. I fight. I fuck. That’s what I know. That’s who I am.”
“Fine! I can live with that. I keep telling you, Roman. I don’t want you to be anyone other than who you are. You say I’m in your soul? Well, you’re in mine. You’re as much a part of me as Mum, Dad, Hadley, Celeste… Just like them, you’ve become woven into the very fabric of who I am, Roman, and I don’t know how to be Piper without you.”
“I’ll bet Carterlovesthat.”
“Mason can deal with it. I’m friends with Craig and Tucker. He really wants to be with me? Well, he’ll just have to accept you’re my friend too.”
He scoffed. “Piper, he knows.”
I blinked as my blood ran cold. “What?”
He gave me a sarcastic frown. “You cannot be stupid enough to think Carter doesn’t see the way I look at you.”
“How do you look at me?” I whispered.
“I look at you like a lifer looks past the prison walls. I look at you like…like you look at mud cake. Okay? You’re that something I need, but I can never have–”
“Roman, I’m standing right here! And, I’m not asking for anything more than you.”
“Fuck,” he muttered, whirling on his heel. As he turned back to face me, he said, “Piper, I care too much about you to let you hold onto me. I’m not the guy you think I am.”
He hiked his bag further up his shoulder and started walking away.
“Fuck that, Lombardi!” I screamed after him and he paused. “You are exactly the guy I think you are! And, I couldn’t care less! I’m just sorry I’m not the girl you wanted me to be!”
He moved so quickly I barely saw him turn and then he was standing in front of me again. “Don’t do that,” he snarled.
Why did that make my heart flutter? Probably some early sign of cardiovascular disease…
“Do what?” I asked, sassing the shit out of him.
“Short-change yourself. You are exactly the girl I wanted. The girl I needed. The girl I knew you were. You’re perfect, no matter how much you wear that stupid mask for everyone else because you think you’re not enough. You don’t apologise for being who you are. Not to me. We don’t apologise, Piper.”
“Apologies might not be necessary, Lombardi, but they are polite.”
His jaw clenched. “Fine. In the spirit of politeness, I’m sorry you can’t have what you want, Piper.”
He turned and walked away again.
“You can be in a shit all you want, Lombardi! But, I know you. I know you miss me as much as I miss you,” I called after him. “We’re friends, remember? That doesn’t just go away because Carter found his sack!” I threw his words back at him.
