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“I tried to use that machine, but it turned out horrible.” He finally jerks his head toward the coffee maker.
“Why didn’t you call Will?” I ask, already filling water in the glass water boiler.
“I wanted to be alone.”
My hands placing the coffee pod halt and I look at him over my shoulder. “Should I leave?”
He shakes his head. I hate to see this lost expression on his face. He looks tired and unhappy and that clenches my chest more than anything.
I place a plate with a piece of custard pie and a cup of coffee before him and thank God a tiny smile appears on his lips.
“How long have you been sitting here?” I push down the bubbling hope in my chest when I notice he’s still dressed in the same shirt he had on this morning.
“A few hours.”
He didn’t leave the suite.
My heart soars and I suppress the smile that is ready to burst out.
Zach polishes off the pie in a few seconds and I can already see his face is more relaxed.
This sugar-addicted man.
He sips his coffee before looking down at his watch. “Why are you up this early?”
“When I didn’t find you in your bed, I got nervous.” I swallow, shifting my weight from one foot to the other. “I thought you went to the fifth floor.”
His head jerks up to me. “Why would you think that?”
“You have barely spoken to me since this morning. You’re avoiding me like I’m contagious.” My throat tightens, betraying me as always. “Was it so bad for you last night? Are you now repulsed by me?”
“God, Hope! What the fuck are you talking about?” He gets up from the chair and circles the counter before standing beside me.
“What else am I supposed to think?” I mumble, as he turns me toward him. His fingers under my chin bring my face closer to his.
“You were not bad. At all. You were…too good,” he whispers before placing his lips on mine.
This kiss is so different from last night. It’s gentle and soft and finished too soon. He rests his forehead on mine, and I can feel his unsteady breath tickling my skin. His big hands are soft as they hold my face.
“I feel like a bastard for making this proposition, Hope. I know it’s not fair to you.” His stormy, pained gaze meets mine, creating thousands of flutters in my chest.
This is what I was missing after the morning. This feeling of being alive, being free, that I know I can only feel with this crazy man.
“Do you…want to go back to our usual life?” he asks and his grip on my face tightens.
“No. I don’t want to go back. At all,” I reply without giving his question a moment of thought. “Unless, you wouldn’t want to, after...knowing.” I shrug.
This time he places a kiss on my forehead. “Your truth doesn’t change how I feel about you.”
My pulse skyrockets, as I give myself permission for a fraction of a second to imagine what his feelings for me really are.
“Your truth only makes me feel like a jerk for not being gentle with you last night. Your truth left me awestruck by your strength. How did you survive the pain, the agony without support?”
My heart squeezes as Zach’s pained gaze settles on my face. His words, his clenched jaw, his fists make me believe as if he can feel my pain as his own.
I place my hand over his thundering heart. “I didn’t think of it…at all. I tried to forget it like a bad dream, and it was doable with so much happening around Ray and Mom. But…I have never felt…as free…as I did last night.”
“Me too.” His confirmation soothes a part of my aching heart. “But I fear how we’ll stay normal for Ray here?” His gaze shifts away from me for a second as he looks around the kitchen.
