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CHAPTER TWELVE
ETHAN
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“Another round of Bernies!” Matt called to the bartender at JJ’s.
“Oh, God,” I moaned. “More tequila?”
“I’ve just started tossing them over my shoulder when he’s not looking.” Tim grinned.
I lifted an eyebrow. “Not a bad plan, bro. Good idea.”
“Matt is on the shot train, but I’ve got rehearsal tomorrow, and I’d prefer not to puke on the priest. Healthy buzz is the goal for the night.”
I laughed, then took a swig of my beer. “Yeah. I’ve got a nice buzz going, and I don’t want to get completely shit-faced tonight either.”
“Gotta be up to performing well for Ivy, huh?” Tim teased, waggling his eyebrows at me.
“Shut up, man.” I smacked him on the shoulder. “It’s not like that. I already explained that we’re just friends.”
“Who?” Evan stuck his head over my shoulder. “You and that Ivy girl? Yeah, right.”
“I’m serious!” I laughed, giving him a nudge. “We’re just friends. Road trip buddies.”
“Liar,” Jake coughed under his breath, and the other guys started laughing.
“You guys suck. Yeah. She’s hot, obviously. And we get along great, but I don’t do commitment, and she doesn’t do casual. So, it’s a non-starter.”
“Sounds like she’s a pretty cool chick from what you’ve told us about her so far.” Ian leaned in between Jake and me.
“Yeah. She is,” I admitted, memories of her laughter and her smile illuminating me from the inside out. “She’s one of a kind.”
Hayden leaned over from the other side of Tim. “So, I still don’t get what the problem is. If you think she’s so awesome, then why not go for it?”
“Because Ijustsaid, I don’t do monogamy and commitment, and she doesn’t do casual. Have you been listening at all?”
Matt paid the bartender and started passing out shots. “So, you’re saying you aren’t ever going to settle down with just one girl? Is the thought of having sex with just one female for the rest of your life that horrifying to you? Really, man?”
“It’s not the sex,” I clarified. “If I found the right girl, I know I wouldn’t have any problems being loyal to her at all. It’s the commitment part. The part where I have to give up the things that make me happy in order to appease her. Every decision I make from then on out has to take her feelings and needs into account. And I’m just not willing to give up my freedom. I tried a couple times in high school, remember? It just doesn’t work for me. If I care about someone, all I want is for them to be happy and, in turn, I end up giving up my own happiness, over and over again.”
“Oh, yeah. You dated Melinda senior year,” Jake noted. “She ran you right over.”
“Exactly.” I grabbed one of the shots Matt handed out. “Exactly like Melinda. And Stacy before her, in junior year. They basically pushed me into doing all sorts of shit I didn’t want to do just to keep them happy. And in return, I was miserable. Then I dated Jackie for a few months, and when I told her I wanted to expand my business into Paradise Isles, she basically said she wasn’t interested in that life, and I was an ass for thinking about leaving her part of the year. She made me choose. And I chose correctly. Relationships just don’t work for me. I’m not doing that again. I learned that lesson early, and I’m grateful for that. It’s allowed me to really live a life where I’m completely free to be myself and pursue all the things I love. I’m happy single. Free. Uninhibited. Living the life I’ve always wanted to.”
“Yeah, but commitment doesn’t always mean giving up your happiness,” Tim argued. “In fact, with therightwoman, it just adds to it exponentially—like Tami and me. She never makes me feel like I have to give up the things that make me happy because the things that make me happy are the things that make her happy. We’re a team, and I can’t imagine my life without her now. She’s the cherry on top of my kickass sundae.”
“Yeah, well, you got lucky,” I said. “That’s rare. Most relationships aren’t that great. Look at Jake and Nikki, for instance.”
Ian cringed. “That chick has run you over how many times? Leaves you a broken wreck, and then you just keep taking her back when she comes sobbing. Screw that. It’s time for you to move on and find someone better. You deserve a good girl. Time to let that one go.”
“Yeah. We’re off again.” Jake chuckled. “Maybe one of these days, I’ll learn.”
“Doubtful.” Hayden snorted. “She’s got you by the balls.”
“Yeah, she does.” Evan laughed. “Can’t blame you, though. That chick isfine.”
Jake cracked him in the arm.
