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“New thing to add to the list.” She spun and faced me, sliding her hands alongside my face. “Kiss someone as the sun disappears.”
She leaned forward and brushed her lips against mine. That blinding pleasure and pain her kiss induced swirled through me as I slid my arm around her and pulled her into me. I knew I shouldn’t keep kissing her and making our parting that much more anguishing, but I couldn’t stop myself. I wanted her kiss. Ineededher kiss. And to hell with how painful it would be to say goodbye.
She sighed as I slid my hand into her hair, gripping the back of her head tight and pulling her lips against me. My tongue pressed inside her mouth as I deepened our kiss, my hand on her lower back supporting her as I pushed her backward.
“You know,” she said against my lips, “There’s something else I’ve never done that I would really like to try.” Her lips moved to my neck then she whispered into my ear, “Sex on the beach.”
Even though I knew it would be torture, I was powerless to stop myself from telling her no ... telling her I couldn’t do this anymore because it would make it that much more painful to say goodbye.
Instead, my unquenchable need to be inside of her stormed through my body, and I slid down and stood in the bed of the truck, spinning myself around and pressing myself between her spread legs. She moaned as I kissed her deeply, pressing her back on the roof of my truck as I folded over her body.
“Oh, God. Yes,” she breathed while I kissed her neck, my hands moving to the front of her jeans. I looked around to make sure the secluded beach was still empty, then I tugged her jeans down, breaking our kiss only long enough to yank them off her feet, pulling her underwear along with them.
She spread her legs as I edged myself between them, reaching into my back pocket and pulling out a condom. My desperate need to be back inside of her made me forgo any foreplay this time, and I just unzipped my pants, slipped on the condom, and grabbed her by the hips, impaling her with the length of my shaft.
“Oh, God,” she moaned out as I pulled her legs over my shoulders.
I let my pain and frustration loose as I drove punishing strokes into her over and over again, hoping with each thrust, it would finally extinguish my need for her. Just one more push, and I would be satiated for life. One more kiss, and finally, I’d have my fill. But instead, every time our bodies connected, my desire for her only burned brighter. It burned so hot it nearly incinerated me from the inside.
“I’m going to come,” she panted out, gripping the back of my neck and raking it with her fingernails.
My own orgasm rose inside of me, and I groaned out her name as I released myself inside her. I collapsed forward, supporting my weight on my elbows beside her head, waiting to find out if this one last release was finally the one that got her out of my system.
I opened my eyes, and the second they locked with hers, my need for her amplified again.
“Fuck!” I roared, pushing myself off her and yanking off the condom, then zipping up my pants.
“What’s wrong?” She sat up quickly, grabbing her pants from the roof of my truck.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” I shouted out over the water, letting my rage and my heartache break free from my chest for the first time.
“Ethan!” She jumped up, hopping into her jeans as she made her way to me at the tailgate of my truck.
I sat down on it, dropping my head into my hands.
“Tell me what’s happening.” She slid an arm around my shoulder and settled in next to me. “I have no idea what’s going on.”
I looked up at her, and the fight to hold up my end of the bargain and support her needs seeped out of me.
“I can’t do this, Ivy. I can’t pretend anymore.”
Confusion clouded her eyes. “What? What are you talking about?”
“I’m saying that I can’t pretend anymore. I can’t pretend that this is just some fling, and it doesn’t mean anything to me.”
Her eyes widened. “What? What are you saying, Ethan?”
I exhaled an exasperated breath. “What I’m saying is that I don’t want this to end tomorrow, and I’m trying not to be selfish and stand in your way, but it’s fucking killing me.”
She stared at me, stunned. “I ... don’t understand. I thought you wanted this to be a fling. I thought you onlydidflings.”
“I did.” I looked away, exhaling a long breath through my nose. “But somewhere along the line, things changed.Ichanged. And now I’ve been killing myself trying to pretend that I haven’t. But I have, Ivy. You. You changed me. A fling with you isn’t good enough. I want more. I don’t want this to end, and I’m done trying to pretend I want anything else. I can’t pretend anymore that I haven’t totally and completely fallen for you.”
“You ... you what?” Her eyes flashed wide as she blinked those long lashes at me.
It felt so good to admit my truth, like the weight of the world finally lifted off my chest and stopped crushing me.
“I did. I fell for you, Ivy. I feel things for you that I didn’t even know I was capable of. My whole life, I’ve spent chasing adventure and excitement, but the one thing I’ve never experienced is falling in love. And now ... now I have. And sitting here ripping my heart out and handing it to you is the scariest thing I’ve ever done. It’s scarier than jumping out of planes, than swimming with sharks, than cliff diving. This, right here, holding my heart out for you, is the scariest fucking thing I’ve ever done. But I can’t not do it. I can’t not tell you how I feel. I know we made rule number one to have this fun fling with no strings attached and no feelings, but I can’t do it, okay? I can’t pretend anymore. This isn’t just a fling for me. I don’t want to say goodbye tomorrow. I don’t want this to end. I’m sorry. I’ve been trying to respect your wishes to just have fun and then end things with no strings attached, but this is just too much for me. It’s torture.”
