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I wished Olivia was still here, someone I could laugh with about the absurdity of our situation.
Hunting scrawny squirrels, and sleeping in trees, when it seemed like only yesterday we had been laughing in our apartment, ordering pizza, and watching trash television. Olivia was my partner in crime, my best friend.
We had met as freshmen in university, two insecure girls with big laughs and bigger dreams. From that point on we were inseparable. Until Olivia was stolen in front of my eyes.
I settled into a tree with intertwining branches, giving me something to lean against as I slept. Not that it mattered. These days I slept with one eye open. I cushioned my head against my backpack, watching the last of the dying light fade out in the distance, leaving me alone with just myself and my thoughts.
It was almost as dangerous as the city.
The amount of people milling about the city was almost overwhelming.
Scratch that. It was entirely overwhelming.
You got used to being alone after a while.
People carrying on normal conversations, the same shops I had walked past countless times, they all assaulted my senses and made me want to turn and run. But I needed boots. A sleeping bag.And a goddamn lighter. I needed to work through it. I wouldn’t be here for long.
“Excuse me! So sorry.” A woman carrying a large purse stumbled into me, not paying attention to where she was going. Or maybe I had been frozen longer than I thought, watching the city wake up. I gave her a quick smile and stepped out of her way. Tugging my sleeves over my wrists, I took a closer look at her. She was definitely one of the lucky ones – the ones who could have babies, and had made peace with giving them up to stay alive.
Her hood was lined with fur, her plush coat a stark white in contrast to my dark clothes. I remembered when white clothes actually stayed white. Not anymore.
But thinking like that was dangerous, and I needed to stay in the here and now.
I shook myself off, walking in the direction of the department store I knew was only a few blocks away.
The city was surreal.
The occasional car still drove by, electric ones that only the richest could maintain. Fuel was nothing more than a dream. A lot of the stores couldn’t keep up with the new way of trade and had gone under very quickly. That left the markets, which were hit or miss at best, and the department stores, which were so desperate to stay alive they would accept nearly anything as currency. It didn’t mean the shelves were stocked, because they usually weren’t. But it was better than nothing.
I walked past two women about my age. They whispered to each other as they strolled along the sidewalk. “Did you hear about...”
I couldn’t quite catch the name, but her friend’s reply was clear. “I heard she got snatched on the way to pick up her daughter from school.”
The first woman responded with a cruel laugh, as if it had been her own fault for getting taken. As if women didn’t deserve to have a safe place to walk, to live. As if we were no more than commodities ourselves.
I knew what I wanted from my life, and I knew it wasn’t this. If I ever had a baby, I wanted that baby to be raised with love. I didn’t want to live infear. A man in a hoodie and a faded pair of jeans walked toward me, and I instinctively shrank into myself.
Don’t draw attention to yourself. Rule number one.
It was easier to blend into the background. He passed me without a second look, and I sighed. The department store was within sight, the same neon sign lit up above the doors. Except now posters covered the windows, a running list of things they no longer had in stock.
Some of the signs looked like they hadn’t been changed in weeks, the tape peeling and the handwritten words faded from sunlight. I had a feeling milk wouldn’t come in this Friday, and hadn’t come in last Friday, or the Friday before that. I couldn’t remember the last time I had milk. When the crops had died, the livestock had dwindled, unable to sustain themselves on the little left. Milk was rare, and beef was even rarer.
My breath came easier as I strode closer to the store. Stores were relatively safer than the streets. Not that clerks wouldn’t look the other way, or couldn’t be bribed, but again, it was relative.
Boots. Granola bars. Sleeping bag. Lighter.
I chanted my list as I stepped, the rhythm keeping my mind off the danger surrounding me.
Boots. Granola bars. Sleeping bag. Lighter. Batteries.
I hoped I had enough money. I could probably scrounge up a few tradeable things in the bottom of my backpack if I needed to.
Boots. Granola bars. Sleeping bag. Lighter. Batteries.
The store loomed thirty paces away. Funny no one was waiting outside. Last time I was here, there was a line to enter.
Boots. Granola bars. Sleeping bag. Lighter. Batteries.
Twenty steps away. One alley, but I could run past that if needed. I was basically safe at this point.
Boots. Granola bars. Sleeping bag. Lighter. Batteries.
The alley lurked on my right, but I kept my eyes focused on the store and picked up my pace.
I was so focused on the store and my chant I didn’t notice the hand wrapping around my wrist until it was too late. I whipped my head from side to side, ready to scream for help, but I already knew the block was empty. A sweet-smelling rag was slapped across my nose and mouth, and then everything went black.
