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I was determined, but with my hand on the doorknob, I stopped, turned, and walked quietly back to the bedroom.
When I had watched her walk through the door of The Coffee Spot, I never expected Suzanne to turn the tables. A quiet, unassuming woman - she had a fiery passion that brought out my animal instincts.
She also had a tender soul that brought out the gentleman in me.
He begged me to stay.
He pleaded with me to find another way.
There was none. I could havenoweakness, nothing someone else could use to control me. If my feelings for Suzanne did not exist, then she was free of me and anyone who thought they could use her to manipulate me.
Some people I could protect by gathering them closer.
Some I could protect by removing the threat.
There was only one I could protect by letting them go.
I slipped into my jacket, then sat beside her on the bed. She stretched sleepily, raising her arms over her head. The sheet fell away from her body, exposing one of her breasts.
I pictured it in my mind - what the perfect goodbye would be like if I had any intention of ever returning to her life.
I tugged on the edge of the sheet, exposing her full breast. I kissed her neck, then her collarbone, then settled over her taut nipple and sucked gently, loving the hard-soft feel of her in my mouth.
Her back arched. She groaned deliciously. Slowly, I kissed my way back to the side of her neck.
“I have to go.”
She smiled. What dreamy thoughts lie behind those languid eyes? I could guess because my thoughts were the same.
“I wish you could stay.”
“I wish I could, too.” Damn, did I want to stay. “But I can’t.” I pulled her robe off the corner of her bedpost. “Come and lock the door behind me.”
She rolled over. “It will be okay. I don’t know if I can even walk.”
I smiled in the darkness. “Thank you for the compliment.”
“I think we’re tied now.”
I smacked her bottom lightly, and she jumped.
“Possibly. I need to know you’re safe and I can’t be worrying about you while I attend this meeting. Come and lock the door.”
I stood on the other side of the apartment door, raised my head to the ceiling, and said a quick prayer before closing the door. The door clicked softly like the final nail in my coffin.
A part of me was dead and would never be revived.
She would live a better life - a happier life - without me.Time.She would need time, but someday, the magic, the intense passions we’d shared, would all fade. Time was the final gift I had to give her. Time away from me. She’d cling to memories like I would, and then - with more time - the memories would fade as well. Another man would hold her in his arms, would call her “sweetheart.” She would raise another man’s children. She would hold another man’s hand. She would whisper to him, and make love with him, and fucking laugh with him, and she would never have another reason to mention my name for as long as she lived.
I would go on without her. One day, I’d find a real way to get out of this business - with or without someone by my side. If my destiny meant I had to be alone for the rest of my life so my family could feel real love, then I will make that sacrifice.
My name is Gabriel Calegari. I am a son, a brother, a friend, and one of the most dangerous men on the planet because now, someone has tried to steal what was mine to protect, the only thing that meant anything to me - the lives of my blood family. I can, and will, do anything to protect my true blood.
Anything.
Including leaving the woman I loved.
I did not shake or falter.
I placed my palm in the center of her door panel and said my goodbye.
“I love you,” I whispered to the air around me. “Be good.”
