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“Whoa, Raven. That was incredible.” He kisses my head and works to slow his breathing. “Did you like it?” This question is timid. He’s afraid I’ll say I didn’t. I want to put his mind at ease.
“Very much,” I purr. My entire body is awash with a sated feeling that has my joints loose, my muscles leaden and my skin replete with a glorious afterglow. It is the most intense orgasm I’ve ever had. Inner Sex Goddess just lit up a cigarette.
“Everything tonight seemed great. What is it about sex that bothers you, Lainey Bird?” he whispers through kisses into the hair at the top of my head.
“Having someone inside me, I guess. It hurts. Every time, not just my first — which was bad, by the way. I just lie there, and pray it’s over soon.”
“Was your former lover … was he a big guy?” Connor’s fingers work through my hair playing with the strands.
I chuckle at his question. Jemmy wasn’t large at all. His prick was thin and short. Nothing like the stallion-sized member Connor has rearing up on hind legs. “Um … not at all.”
“And foreplay didn’t help?”
“There wasn’t usually any foreplay,” I say absently. “He just went for it.”
“Baby, that’s a problem. No wonder you didn’t like it. If he didn’t take the time to properly prepare your body, sex would be rather uncomfortable for you.”
“That’s just not how he did it. Wasn’t his style I guess.” My Inner Sex Goddess has smoke rising up out of her head at the notion I’d even try to make excuses for that douche nozzle.
“Was he your only lover, then?” Connor’s voice is soft and quiet.
“Yes, why?”
“Because it’s not a matter of preference or style, Lainey. There are rules to sex.”
“Rules? For sex?” I nearly want to laugh.
“Yes. Rule number one. You should always feel safe. Safe sharing your body and safe letting your heart go with it. You should never feel like it’s an obligation or something you’re required to do.”
I think on that for a second. Did I feel safe with Jemmy? Maybe at first. No. Not even then. I felt pressured and rushed. Toward the end of our relationship, I felt used. “What’s rule number two?”
“Rule number two is that sex is about giving, not taking. My job is to pleasure you to insanity, and your job is to pleasure me. We give to one another, we don’t take from one another. Does that make sense?”
“I guess so. It wasn't that way with Jemmy.” Jemmy took from me. He took too much.
“Jemmy is a bastard. And if I ever get the chance, I’m going to shove my fist into his throat for what he did to you. No man should treat a woman the way he treated you. Were you two dating or were you just sleeping together?”
“I thought we were dating, but it turns out we were just sleeping together. I wasn’t his only one.”
I feel Connor’s fists clench as I utter these words and instantly regret saying them, although I’m telling the truth. Almost the whole truth.
“Don’t,” I say, rubbing the lion on his back with my fingertips again. “It’s over now. Are there any more rules?”
Connor lets out another breath before he continues. “The joining is the destination, not an orgasm. You can have great sex and not come. It’s about being satisfied. Even for men. It is possible to have sex and really enjoy it and not reach climax, and that’s OK. It can’t be all about that. Then, it’s just working a job. Sex is about connection, not orgasm.”
I grin against him at hearing that. “Something tells me you rarely have to employ that rule,” I tease.
“That’s true.” We both laugh lightly at that.
“Is that all?” I stroke the lion on his back imagining what it would feel like to run my fingers through the mane — if it were real.
“No. The last one is almost as important as the first one. I doubt you’ll have any trouble with it, Little Bird.”
“What’s that?” I ask, still stroking the lion’s mane.
“You have to talk to each other,” Conner says. I hear the irony in his tone.
“What do you mean?”
